


Come Into Being

by Jaina



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Circular Narrative, F/F, Fluff, I suck at tags, Robin who?, all the feels, season 3 fix it fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-16
Updated: 2014-09-16
Packaged: 2018-02-17 15:33:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 33,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2314538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jaina/pseuds/Jaina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Regina Mills wakes up alone on one of the most important - and terrifying - days of her life. But it isn't all bad. Not until things take a turn for the worse. It was a long journey to get to where she and Emma Swan are now. Will it all have been for naught?</p><p>Warnings: Non-graphic mention and reference to the non consensual nature of Leopold's relationship with Regina.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. i.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [artbyjoana](https://archiveofourown.org/users/artbyjoana/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Come Into Being](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2289650) by [artbyjoana](https://archiveofourown.org/users/artbyjoana/pseuds/artbyjoana). 



> Many, many thanks to ohthesefeelingz for betaing this monstrosity for me, and to ludivinelaurel for her encouragement and support throughout writing this thing. I was feeling pretty jammed with this fic when I got her note cheering me on.
> 
> P.S. Take a look at the chapter names when you start reading. Those are fairly important for the structure of this one. 
> 
> Warnings: Non-graphic mention and reference to the non consensual nature of Leopold's relationship with Regina.

The soft sigh of the door sliding shut and the faint click as it slipped back into place woke Regina. It didn’t take much. She had only drifted in and out of sleep the night before, but it wasn’t nightmares or the stress of the upcoming day that had kept her awake. It was the absence of warmth, the way the bed didn’t shift under slight movements and changes of position that weren’t her own, the occasional knee in her back, and cold toes slipped between her thighs seeking out warmth. It was because of the woman currently sneaking back into her bedroom.

 

Regina couldn’t hold back the smile that curled over her lips. She was glad the hair falling forward over her face would hide it. She would have buried her face further into the pillow she clutched in both arms if it wouldn’t have given her away. As it was, she made an effort to keep her breathing slow and steady. She wanted to see what Emma had in mind.

 

Though her eyes were still closed it was easy enough to follow Emma’s movement through the room. Faint creaks alerted her as Emma tried to tiptoe across the wooden floor toward the bed. Even after sharing Regina’s bed for a decade, she still wasn’t as adept at avoiding the loose floorboards as Regina or even Henry. The faint rustle of clothing made Regina strain to pick out something more concrete. She couldn’t tell...two gentle thumps of something more solid hitting the rug beside the bed made Regina smile again. Now that noise was easy enough to identify; she heard it every night after all, as Emma slipped off her boots and got ready to come to bed. A muted squeak and another thud followed, not as heavy and resounding as the first two. Regina’s brows furrowed as she thought. Perhaps Emma’s leather jacket being casually thrown over the chair in the corner of the room. How many times would she have to remind the woman to hang it up instead of leaving it draped over furniture throughout the house? It was ridiculous.

 

The soft rustle of more fabric being dropped to the floor caught Regina’s attention, followed by the scrape of jeans being pulled down and then summarily kicked away. Emma must be down to next to nothing by now. Did she still have on a bra? Or perhaps she had only pulled on an undershirt this morning. Regina couldn’t remember what Emma had been wearing when she left the night before. She had been too busy slipping her hands under Emma’s shirt, seeking bare skin that burned against her fingers with the rightness of them. The way their bodies had been pressed against one another without a breath of air between them as she kissed Emma senseless was etched into her memory with an intensity that would never fade.

 

Regina bit her lip. Perhaps Emma was wearing her red thong. It was too much to hope that it was the entire matching set. Emma wasn’t nearly so coordinated without Regina’s direct intervention unless she was planning something special. It wasn’t likely that Emma had thought so far the night before. Her decision to go had been spur of the moment and nothing Regina had said had been able to persuade her to stay. A smile curved over Regina’s lips as she remembered just how she had tried to convince Emma.

 

_“It’s the right thing to do,” Emma had insisted, pulling her hair back into a messy ponytail even as she bent down to kiss Regina again._

_Regina had clung to her, one hand slipping behind her neck and the other curling around Emma’s waist to pull the other woman down to her. “Don’t go,” she had murmured. She wouldn’t plead. Instead she had nipped at Emma’s bottom lip and let her nails dig into the sensitive skin at the back of Emma’s neck._

_“Regina,” Emma had whimpered and for a moment, Regina thought she had caved. Then Emma had straightened, almost pulling Regina up with her, the muscles of her back and neck rippling with the strength it had taken to pull that off. “I have to go. We don’t need any more bad luck.”_

_Regina had huffed and sat back against the headboard. “It’s nothing more than a ridiculous superstition, dear. One that I cannot believe you hold.”_

_Emma had quirked a smile at her as she flipped her hair out from beneath the back of her shirt. “Humor me?”_

_“You’re lucky I love you,” Regina had grumbled, turning away to pluck up the book that had been sitting on the bedside table and thumbing through it idly._

_“Damn straight,” Emma had agreed, leaning in to brush her lips across Regina’s once more before she stood. “I’ll let Henry know what’s up before I go so he doesn’t worry.”_

_“Mmm,” Regina hummed, feigning focus on her book. It wouldn’t do to watch Emma walk away._

_Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Emma pause by the bedroom door. “I love you.”_

_The slight lift of Emma’s voice at the end might have once made Regina think it was a question, something that Emma wasn’t certain of. Regina knew better now. It was a request and, for all her irritation with Emma’s decision that evening, it was a request Regina couldn’t help but fulfill. She had let her book fall into her lap and lifted her head to gaze fully at Emma. She had smiled and tried to ignore the pang in her heart, the part of her that wanted to pull Emma back to bed, not because she couldn’t live without her but because she didn’t want to. She hadn’t gone yet and Regina already missed her. It wasn’t fair. “I love you, darling.”_

_Emma had laughed, as if she hadn’t been poised, waiting for those words. “Night, babe.” She had blown Regina a kiss and darted out the door, pulling it shut behind her. Regina had shaken her head and listened to Emma make her way down the hall, then the faint murmur of voices as she spoke to Henry before she picked up her book._

 

The bed shifted under someone else’s weight. Regina imagined Emma pressing her knee into the edge and then trying to slide, in what she believed was stealth, beneath the covers. Arms slipped around Regina’s waist and lips pressed against her shoulder, skin bared where silk had slipped down in her sleep. Emma shifted again until the line of her body was pressed against Regina’s, warming her back pleasantly. She couldn’t resist the urge to wiggle back against Emma, snuggling closer. Emma chuckled and nuzzled into Regina again. “I knew you were faking it.”

 

“The first and only time you’ve had cause to say that in our bed, Miss Swan,” Regina pointed out, her voice rough from sleep. She hadn’t rolled to face Emma yet, content to stay where she was in the circle of Emma’s arms.

 

“Damn straight, Madame Mayor,” Emma agreed. Her lips brushed across Regina’s skin again, leaving a trail of delicate kisses up to the base of her throat.

 

“I thought this was bad luck,” Regina said, after a few moments of lying there in shared silence.

 

“Yeah, no, that was just about last night.” Emma’s hand trailed down her back until it came to rest on the swell of her ass.

 

Regina laughed and finally turned to face her. “I think you just couldn’t stay away from me, dear.”

 

“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” Emma disagreed, but she didn’t resist as Regina slid her hand into Emma’s hair and stroked her cheek with her thumb. Their lips met gently, once and then again, before Regina deepened the kiss and tugged Emma down closer to her. The weight of Emma’s body against her own grounded her, kept her from floating away on this wave of pure happiness. It left her feeling almost delirious.

 

Regina sighed, breathing out against Emma’s lips and letting her forehead rest against Emma’s. Her fingers slid down to brush across Emma’s lips, the ghost of a caress before her hand dropped down to rest against her chest. “I’m glad you came home.”

 

“Missed me?” Emma teased.

 

“Mmm,” Regina agreed, letting her voice deepen and her hand trail lower. “I thought about you last night, when you were gone and I was all by myself in our bed.”

 

Emma gulped, pushing herself up on her elbows to look at Regina. “Seriously?”

 

Regina gave a little half-shrug. “I missed you.”

 

“Damn,” Emma cursed, and rolled to fall onto the bed beside Regina. “I’m an idiot.”

 

“Indeed.” Regina purred. “You shouldn’t have gone.”

 

Emma must have heard something in her voice because she shot back up to a sitting position. “You didn’t really. You’re just saying that to drive me crazy.”

 

Regina folded her arms across her chest and raised an eyebrow at Emma. “You’ll never know, dear.”

 

Emma moaned and dropped her head to rest against Regina’s shoulder. “You’re evil.”

 

“Yes, dear. You may remember a moniker I was given along those lines,” Regina pointed out, taking no offense at Emma’s statement, enjoying it even. There was no doubt in her mind how Emma meant it.

 

“It rings a bell,” Emma admitted, just as playfully.

 

“You should consider it,” Regina said, stroking the hair back from Emma’s face and tucking it behind her ear so Regina could see her clearly. “Today is rather final, after all.”

 

“Nuh-uh,” Emma said, shaking her head. “I knew what I was getting into, Regina Mills. I’m not letting you get away again.” She paused for dramatic effect. “Even if I always do find you.”

 

Regina scoffed, nudging Emma away from her with her foot. “Enough of that, dear. We are not your parents.” Regina shuddered and then rolled to the edge of the bed. She sat up and took the robe from the bed, then stood to slip it on. Regina could feel Emma’s eyes on her as she walked toward the closet. “What?” she demanded when she couldn’t take Emma’s staring any longer.

 

“Nothing,” Emma said, but she belied her words by crossing the room to slip her arms around Regina once more. “Just thinking about how much I love our family and how happy I am to be marrying you today.”

 

 


	2. iv.

_They had talked about marriage before. Emma had once jokingly proposed, her head lying on Regina's abdomen looking up at her with contented, shining green eyes full of adoration. Her hand stroked the outside of Regina's thigh, not meant to arouse or tease. They were both sated - for the moment. But Emma always liked to touch her after. At first, Regina had thought she would find it annoying. She had braced herself for it, prepared to snap at the lingering caresses. To her surprise, she had found them relaxing and comforting, not clingy. Emma was never that, more apt to run than hold too hard. Her touches most often fleeting, left Regina wanting more. It was a promise that Emma had rarely failed to deliver on._

_But that night, when whatever crass phrase had occurred to Emma - Regina can’t remember (Lies, lies, lies. She remembered perfectly. A simple, “marry me.”) - popped out of her mouth, every muscle in Regina’s body had tensed. There had been no hesitation._

_“No.”_

_The silence had echoed in the room, loud enough that Regina could hear every tick of the clock, whir of the fan blade and beat of her heart. After a long moment, Emma had pushed herself up to a sitting position and slipped off the bed. There was no lingering caress of her fingers tracing from Regina’s thigh, brushing across her knee, glancing her ankle and setting Regina tingling from head to toe. Emma walked to the bathroom and shut the door. Regina had pulled her knees up to her chest, locked her arms around her knees and refused to shiver. She had waited what had seemed like an eternity for Emma to come out, to leave. It was inevitable. The only thing that remained to be seen was how. Would it be with yelling and demands to know why the hell Regina wouldn’t marry her? Or cold silence as Emma walked away without another word?_

_When Emma had at long last come out of the bathroom, it had been with silence. Regina hadn’t realized she was holding her breath until her lungs began to burn. Without a word, Emma had turned out the lamp beside the bed and slipped in beside Regina._

_It had been hours before Regina had relaxed enough to slide down beside her and she hadn’t slept at all that night. If Emma was waiting for her to sleep before she walked out, well, Regina wanted to see it coming. She had pressed her hand against cool soft sheets and reached across the distance between them, wanting to close it. The warmth of Emma’s skin was tantalizing. It pulled to Regina like a magnet, but she couldn't regret her response. Her fingers clenched into a fist and she hadn’t reached for Emma again that night._

_It had taken them months to get back to where they had been before, but Emma hadn’t left and she had never asked again. Part of Regina was grateful. It had taken almost that long - and several visits to Archie - visits that even Emma didn't know about- for her heart to stop trying to beat its way out of her chest in panic at the thought of what Emma had done._

_That had been years ago, almost seven now. Since then she and Emma had settled into a mostly comfortable domesticity that Regina would have once thought impossible. Marriage hadn’t seemed necessary and Regina thought her feelings on the matter hadn’t changed. She had gotten her happy ending, after all. She didn’t need anything more than Emma and Henry and her previous marriage had done nothing to recommend the state. It was a reminder of the worst time in Regina’s life. The trapped feeling of utter desolation and desperation that had led her to convince Sydney to slip Agraban vipers into her husband’s bed was not one she wanted to visit, never with Emma. It was best avoided._

_The day Regina had changed her mind hadn’t been a memorable one, just another grey, rainy day in Maine in the fall. Regina had been strolling down the streets of Storybrooke with her arm linked through Henry’s. Her son had been unusually jittery, bouncing from one conversational topic to the next, sounding more like his other mother than Regina was often prepared to admit._

_“What is going on, dear?” Regina had asked him, when she couldn’t take it anymore._

_“I need to get something.” Henry hedged. It was unlike him and if his strange behavior hadn’t clued her in already, it would have been enough to tell Regina just how nervous and uncertain he was feeling about it._

_“And...you needed my help with it?” Regina suggested, trying to summon up some insight into her son’s thought process._

_“Yes.” Henry hesitated. “It’s really important, Mom. I can’t screw it up. Will you help me?”_

_“Of course, Henry. You know I’d do anything for you,” Regina had said, more than a little puzzled about what was so urgent._

_“Great,” Henry said, almost bouncing up and down with his excitement. “We’re here.”_

_Regina looked up. “Here” was a medium sized shop that Regina had only had rare occasion to visit. After all, the curse had supplied her with all the jewelry Regina Mills could possibly need when it had brought them to Maine. As the Queen, she had enjoyed jewels and finery, of course. It was fitting that she should have her due and that everyone should see the symbols of her status and power and bow before it. In Storybrooke, it hadn’t seemed so important. She had been in control of everything and when Henry had come into her life none of it had mattered anymore._

_Regina stopped and turned to face him. “Henry Mills,” she said, arching her brows at him and pinning him with a far steadier and more unnerving gaze than she normally did. “Why are we here?” He had a girlfriend - Evelyn - of just over six months, and if her son - her baby boy - was thinking of proposing to a girl he had known for that short of a period of time, before he had even graduated, he could think again._

_“I need something for Evie?” he tried._

_“Such as?” Regina prompted, still focusing intently on breathing and holding back the magic that pushed at her fingers to get out whenever she was upset or frightened._

_“The best anniversary present ever. I kind of screwed up, Mom.”_

_“I doubt that, dear.” Regina forced the words out past the lump in her throat, one of pure relief. She wasn’t ready for her son to be such a grown up yet. She knew they were, for all intents and purposes, living together at college, but Evelyn still retained her own apartment across town from him and Regina clung hard to that fact. She was proud of Henry, but he was still her baby, her little prince. She wasn’t prepared for him to grow up and move on, move past her. Not yet. “Tell me about it and we shall see if we can find something that will suit your needs.”_

_“You’re the best, Mom,” Henry had muttered, looking relieved to escape further interrogation and squeezed her into a sideways hug before he pulled her into the shop._

_Regina had wandered around the store with Henry for several minutes, pointing out lovely pieces until Henry sauntered off toward some of the more avant-garde pieces. Some of it might have been to her taste in her days as the Evil Queen, but no longer. She was content to browse, happy to spend time with Henry in whatever form it took. He was home often now that he had finished college, but it was never often enough for her._

_The glint of green caught her eye. There was nothing else about the plain gold band that would have. It was slender and rather plain, more matte than brilliant and decidedly not to Regina's taste. The chips of green stone embedded in the band were the exact color of Emma's eyes, green fading into a center of rich, warm brown, almost golden. The chips were laid out in an asymmetrical pattern across the band, forming a shape that hinted at the sinuous curve of the back of a great bird in flight - perhaps a swan._

_Regina was reaching for it before she could think. Her fingers hit the glass of the display case and stroked over the smooth cool surface. She glanced up at the attendant and raised one finger in a gesture that had the young woman scurrying over._

_"Yes, Maje- ma'am?" For a moment Regina tried to recall the girl's name - if she'd ever known it - but nothing was ringing a bell for her. No matter._

_"I'd like to see that one."_

_"Of course." It took the girl a moment to open the case. Her hands were shaking and she fumbled with key several times before she managed to slide it into the lock. There was a moment where it looked as if she had chosen the wrong key and the lock wouldn't turn. Irritation surged within Regina. She hadn't been the Evil Queen for likely half this girl's life. It was ridiculous. The desire to make the ring reappear in her hand with a flick of her fingers was almost impossible to resist. Regina clenched her hand into a fist, willing her impatience down. It wouldn't do to ruin this._

_"This one?" The girl asked, producing it at last._

_"Yes." Regina snatched it from the girl's hand a little bit too quickly but she ignored the girl's gasp. Really, if she was so sensitive about customers and their former positions in life, her manager should find someone better suited for the position._

_The box the ring was held in was made of some tawdry material. It felt cheap and disposable in her hand but all Regina cared about was the ring. The moment it was in her hand, she relaxed. The cool metal warmed quickly in her palm and she had the strange urge to brush the stones against her lips to feel their smoothness. Her hand shut tightly around it, the chips of stone biting into her palm._

_"I'll take it." The words were uttered without a conscious decision. She wasn't going to let it go again._

_"You're buying something, Mom?" Henry asked, surprise in his voice as he appeared just over her shoulder._

_She held the ring tighter. "Yes, dear." She tried to make it sound light and breezy but her tone was all wrong._

_Out of the corner of her eye, Regina saw Henry glance at the empty box on the counter and then the display case beneath._

_"Whoa, Mom. Who's that for?"_

_"Your mother." Her throat was tight with anxiety and the words came out strangled but she knew Henry understood her well enough by the way his eyes widened._

_“You’re not talking about yourself in the third person?” His brows shot up, nothing like her signature look of mockery or challenge, but in pure surprise._

_Regina pinned him with a glance that told him he knew better than that._

_“Right. Wow.” Henry laughed. “I didn't know that was something you'd been thinking about."_

_Regina swallowed and tried to ignore the way her heart was pounding in her chest. She didn't need to glance around the store to know that people were staring at them, at her. No matter how much people had come to accept her presence in town over time, the wariness and gossip persisted. "I think I'd prefer not to have this conversation here."_

_A muscle in Henry's jaw tightened as he took a quick glance around. He noted the woman in the corner, not peering at the jewels in the case before her, the saleswoman ducking her head as soon as she saw Henry watching and another customer with his head cocked in their direction clearly trying to eavesdrop._

_"You'd think they would have found something better to do by now," Henry growled loud enough to be heard by everyone and sounding every bit like Emma._

_"You would think they would have realized I no longer have any desire to subjugate the masses by this point," Regina noted, bemused rather than angered by their treatment. There were only a few people whose opinion mattered to her and these nosy gossips were not among them._

_Henry snorted. "Probably not helping, Mom."_

_She shrugged carelessly._

_"Do you want to put it back in the box, ma'am?" Their saleswoman asked, reappearing at last with a bag and the necessary papers._

_Regina didn't want to let it out of her hand, much less her sight but holding on to it would look ridiculous. "Of course." She handed it over and fetched her credit card, passing it over without another word. It wasn't until the transaction had been finished and they were back out on the street that some of Regina's tension began to become bearable again._

_The ring box was a solid, reassuring weight against her thigh in the pocket of her trench coat as she once again slipped her arm through Henry's. Together they walked in companionable silence for a few moments before she was ready to answer him. Henry kept throwing her little glances and then looking away again as he struggled to contain himself and be patient._

_"I haven't," Regina said, at last. "Been thinking about it. I never intended to again. Emma asked me once."_

_"I know."_

_Regina froze and looked over at him in surprise. "I didn't think you did."_

_Henry shrugged. "I'm pretty sure you two didn't speak for at least a week. It was really weird so I asked her about it. I thought she'd done something, you know? To make you mad."_

_That Henry hadn't thought it was her then, hadn't assumed she was the one who messed up was beyond words. Her chest was tight and warm. She couldn't breathe with the emotion of it all. Or maybe it was just the remembered fear. She had come so close to losing Emma to her inability to say yes._

_"Henry..." How to explain to him... He knew of her marriage to Leopold in theory but he didn't understand. He couldn't know and she would never, ever tell him. Even if she was certain Emma suspected. "What did she say?"_

_"That she had asked, and she hadn't realized how much she meant it until you said no," Henry told her gently, as if wanting to spare her this blow._

_Regina sighed and laid her head against his shoulder for the briefest moment. "I have no idea why she stayed."_

_Henry smiled and Regina's heart melted. "She loves you." He said it as if that explained everything, and maybe it did._

_Regina straightened and swallowed, not daring to look over at Henry as they walked. "If I asked, do you think she would say yes?" The question had been nagging at her since she had first held the ring, knowing whose finger she wanted to see it on, with a matching ring on her own hand._

_Henry shot her a look. "Mom. I'm the truest believer. She's going to say yes."_

_Regina snorted. "Life isn't a fairytale, dear. Your mother and I certainly aren't."_

_Henry stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, turning to face her, taking his hand in both of hers and holding her gaze. "She'll say yes, Mom."_

_Regina looked down and nodded, taking a deep breath. "I hope you're right."_

_Henry laughed. "I'm always right. So," he drew the word out obnoxiously, letting go of her hand and strolling away again. "How are you gonna ask her? It has to be something spectacular, right?"_

_Regina's heart sank. Henry was right. It would be expected. She had a reputation to maintain after all._

_\---   ---   ---_

_Regina would never admit it, but she had spent many of the intervening hours strategizing, determining the best way to propose to Emma. She had considered and discarded a myriad of romantic gestures. It wasn’t the way that she and Emma operated. Any gestures on their part were most often spontaneous and more genuine and heartfelt because of it. She didn’t want this to become some grand plan that became more about the plan than the question she wanted an answer too. It would feel all wrong._

_That was the worst of it. Now that the ring was in her pocket and the question waited to be asked, Regina desperately wanted to know what Emma would say. Despite Henry’s attempt at reassurance, she was uncertain that it would be yes. Emma had as many doubts and uncertainties as she did and after refusing her once years ago…_

_The mayoral mansion was deserted except for Regina this evening. Henry had returned to his apartment that evening to do more shopping for “the best anniversary gift ever” on the internet. Regina suspected that less time would be spent on the shopping, and rather more on hanging out with Evie just as soon as Henry’s girlfriend was finished with work, but she had said nothing. She needed time to think herself. Unfortunately, her thoughts had yet to yield anything useful._

_The sound of the front door slamming followed by a muffled curse brought a smile to Regina’s face. That would be Emma returning home at last. Regina could allow her to curse, fumble, and fight her way up the stairs, or mercifully, go downstairs and make certain that her sheriff had something to eat. There was pot roast keeping warm for her in the oven, and Emma had probably skipped lunch again. Someone had to make sure she ate._

_"Hello, dear." Regina greeted Emma as she did every other day, but tonight the words sounded odd in her own ears. She was surprised that Emma didn't notice._

_"Hey, babe," Emma called back, rooting through the refrigerator. Regina winced at the nickname. No matter how many times Emma used it, she couldn’t become used to it or less annoyed by it. "Sorry I didn't make it home in time for dinner. Dopey had this thing." Regina didn't have to see her face to visualize Emma's exasperated eye roll. "Was Henry here?"_

_Regina shook her head and then realized Emma couldn't see her replying, "No, he decided to have dinner with his grandparents. He wanted to spend time with them before he has to head back to school. He and I went shopping this afternoon."_

_That made Emma stop digging through the refrigerator where a six-pack of beer awaited her and turn to face Regina. "You dragged him shopping?"_

_"No, dear. The opposite this time. He wanted help picking out a gift for Evelyn." It reminded her discomfortingly of what she had purchased and was still in her pocket. "Would you like dinner? I saved you some roast."_

_Emma mock-swooned, turning back to Regina as she tossed the lid of her beer into the garbage and stepped into Regina's space. She wrapped her arms around Regina's waist and pressed her lips against the soft skin at the crook of Regina's neck. "You're the best. I would starve without you."_

_"Yes, I know," Regina acknowledged dryly. "You only love me because I feed you."_

_Emma laughed. "Not just that." She let her hands slide down from Regina's hips to brush over the swell of her ass as Regina turned away to get a plate from the cabinet. "There are other things."_

_"I see." There was no bite in Regina's tone, only amusement, and if it was a little forced, Emma didn't seem to notice. When the plate was filled and silverware gathered, Regina moved around to put it in front of Emma. The domesticity of the moment wasn’t odd. It hadn’t been in many years. Emma didn’t look panicked at the prospect of a family meal, and telling Regina about her day was just what happened, not something strange and awkward._

_Regina’s hand brushed over Emma’s shoulder before she sat down with her. Emma looked up from her food long enough to flash her an acknowledging smile. When Emma had eaten enough that her hunger was slacked she paused between bites long enough to question Regina further. “So the kid must have been pretty worried about the gift for Evie if he dragged you away from work?”_

_“I suppose,” Regina allowed._

_“Do you think he screwed up?” Emma wondered._

_“Henry? Hardly.” Regina dismissed the suggestion, with a wave of her hand only to find herself staring at Emma’s bemused expression. “I raised him to be a gentleman,” Regina countered Emma’s silent challenge._

_“You did.” Emma shrugged. “But he’s also got my genes.”_

_Regina smirked. “I like your jeans.”_

_It was enough to make Emma laugh. “Finally you admit it. Just how long have you been staring at my ass, Madame Mayor?”_

_“Wouldn’t you like to know, dear.” Regina’s fingers drifted down to cover Emma’s hand where it was splayed out on the table in a very unmannerly fashion. Really the woman’s table manners were atrocious. The ring was still digging into her hip. She had thought Emma might notice it earlier, but Emma had said nothing. “I bought something today.”_

_“Oh?” The comment was more rhetorical than anything else, the majority of Emma’s attention still fixed on her food. “When you were shopping with Henry?”_

_Regina found she could do nothing but nod. Why had she said that? She hadn’t intended to. This wasn’t the way she wanted to… Not that she knew how yet, but she needed something more...worthy of Emma before she could ask her. Lying was out of the question though. Emma would know if she did, and even if she didn’t press Regina about why, the knowledge would nag at Emma. That wasn’t what Regina had wanted at all._

_“So not lingerie then?” Emma teased her with a mock-disappointed frown._

_Regina sniffed. Some responses came automatically, managing to override the frantic way her heart was beating. “Don’t be ridiculous. Not with our son present.”_

_“Right,” Emma agreed. “Are you going to tell me or make me play twenty questions?”_

_“Does anything I do ever come easily?”_

_Emma laughed, turning her hand over to twine her fingers with Regina’s. “Only when I do that thing with my tongue.”_

_“Miss Swan!” Regina protested, sitting up and tugging at their joined hands as was expected of her. She wasn’t disappointed when Emma refused to let go._

_“Yeah, sorry.” Emma said, not looking the least bit repentant._

_Silence slipped back in for a moment, easy and comfortable between them. Regina’s thumb stroked the side of Emma’s hand. “Perhaps I should just show you.”_

_Emma glanced up, her eyes bright and glittering with mischief. Before she could make another comment about lingerie, Regina shifted forward enough to slip the ring box out of her pocket and laid it on the table between them. She didn’t let go of Emma’s other hand as she flipped it open and left it there, waiting for some response from Emma._

_“Regina?” Emma’s voice was high-pitched and cracked mid-word._

_“Yes, dear?” Regina replied, proud in a distant way of how she’d managed to keep her voice from quavering. It was the way her hands trembled that gave her away._

_“What is that?”_

_“A ring.”_

_“Yeah, I got that.” Emma bit her lip, her gaze flicking back and forth between Regina and the ring. “You know I don’t wear much jewelry.”_

_Regina swallowed again, before reaching for Emma’s beer and drinking. She was parched. “I was hoping you might consent to wear this one, dear.”_

_“I might,” Emma allowed. “Where should I wear it?” She looked up at Regina with a hopeful, terrified expression._

_Regina couldn’t blame Emma for being wary after her previous refusal. Regina raised their joined hands - Emma’s left - in her own and lifted it to her lips, kissing the back of her hand lightly before stroking Emma’s ring finger with her thumb. “I was hoping you would wear it here. Indefinitely.”_

_Emma’s eyes were boring into Regina’s, blazing with something bright and intense. “Put it on?”_

_Regina nodded, her fingers scrabbling a little as she reached for the ring, unwilling to look away from Emma’s gaze. She had to once she had the ring in her hand to slip it onto Emma’s finger. There was no way that Emma could miss the way she was trembling now, when her hands were visibly shaking as she did so. The cool ring settled into place and Regina glanced back up at Emma._

_Emma opened her mouth to say something and then stopped with a shake of her head. She cupped Regina’s face with her hand, fingers sinking into Regina’s hair and pulled her forward until their lips met and Emma was kissing her like she would never have the chance again. Regina kissed her back just as fiercely. Her relief was almost overwhelming but stood as nothing against the way Emma tasted and the softness of her lips. They were both panting when the kiss began to ease an Emma drew away only far enough to rest her forehead against Regina’s._

_“Are you serious? You really want to marry me? I thought-”_

_“I know. I’m sorry. When you asked…” It was Regina’s turn to shake her head. “I was terrified. All I could remember was the feeling of being trapped. It was something I never wanted to experience again and certainly not with you. But today, when I saw that ring, all I could think of was you. Not…”_

_“Him.” Emma said flatly. There was no need to clarify which him she meant._

_“Yes. It didn’t feel like being trapped; it felt like...the most terrifying thing I’d ever done honestly. But it was my decision. I wanted it, if you do?”_

_Emma nodded emphatically. “Oh yeah.” She pushed her plate away and shifted in her seat so that she could tug Regina closer. Regina came willingly, letting Emma draw her down onto her lap. “Let me show you just how much.”_

 

 


	3. ii.

When Emma got the phone call, it was a fucking relief, best sound she'd heard all day. It was sweet salvation to be rescued from Mary Margaret's clutches. If Mary Margaret had once had doubts about Emma's relationship with Regina they were long gone now and Mary Margaret had thrown herself into helping with her only daughter's wedding with an enthusiasm that was more terrifying than an ogre with anger issues.

 

Regina had refused to rescue her, saying she wouldn't deprive Snow of her daughter again, and smiling a smugly satisfied smile. Emma's stomach had churned, but it was the smile on Regina's face that had left her glaring. Amused and unsympathetic was not what Emma was looking for. Kathryn and Henry were the only two who would be with Regina before the ceremony and neither would fuss over her and primp her hair or tell her nauseating platitudes about true love and the wonderfulness of life until it made her want to punch something in the face. Really hard.

 

So when the phone call came, Emma snatched up the phone right away. "Sheriff Swan." She listened for a moment, glancing at Snow out of the corner of her eye, considering how much she would need to sell it to escape without managing to raise Mary Margaret's suspicions. Then her attention sharpened. It seemed lying wouldn't be needed. "Magical mayhem. Right. That sounds serious. Text me the address and I'll be there in five."

 

"Emma," Mary Margaret protested. "Oh no you don't. Let David take care of this. You have a wedding to get to."

 

"Sorry, can't," Emma said, not sounding apologetic at all. "You know I need David working security for the wedding. I don't need anyone deciding today is a good day to pick up old grudges. I've got this. I'll be back in plenty of time, Mom. The wedding's not for hours."

 

"Emma..." But Emma didn't wait to see what else Mary Margaret had to say, already slipping out the front door. There was that whole better to ask forgiveness than permission thing, although Emma didn't feel like she needed either.  What she needed was to escape before she screamed and this was the perfect opportunity.

 

 _You so owe me_ , she sent the text off to Regina on the way to the patrol car. She had been saving it back in case she needed to make a quick getaway from Mary Margaret's overwhelming tendencies but this would work too.

 

 _Hardly, dear. Don't be late_. The reply came back in an instant, the phone vibrating in Emma's hand in a short sharp burst to get her attention. She smiled down at the message and took a quick second to answer her.

 

_No way in hell._

 

***.      ****.     ***

 

“Sherriff!” Her title greeted Emma like a cheer as she stepped out of the patrol car. Despite it’s jovial tone something about it set Emma’s teeth on edge. Years before she had become Storybrooke’s sheriff, Emma had learned to pay attention to hunches like that. They had served her well more often than not, and over a decade of trying to bring order to a town full of fairytale characters with a variety of irritating magical talents and complex feuds had done nothing but reinforce those instincts.

 

It was obvious the party had been going on for some time. Trucks and cars were parked in a loose, chaotic semicircle around the small clearing. Music blared and a few girls danced laconically in front of them. Bottles of beer and wine were scattered all around, carelessly discarded and there were more than a few red solo cups in the hands of kids Emma knew were far too young to be drinking. It was a call about a magical disturbance that had brought Emma out here but so far she hadn’t seen anything but some underage drinking and a party that was going to get out of hand. Irritating, time consuming, and the last thing she needed on her wedding day.  

 

“Alright, everyone. Listen up!” Emma yelled. When it did nothing to penetrate the volume of the music blaring from the vehicles, Emma sighed. She wasn’t ready to just start arresting kids. There was only one of her - and several dozen of them. She had faced worse odds, but this wasn’t about survival. This was about paperwork and there was no way in hell she wanted to stare down that multi-headed monster. Three more always appeared whenever one was finished.

 

Emma put her fingers to her mouth and let out a piercing whistle. She _might_ have given it some extra magical oomph, because this time it did manage to cut through the noise. She waited until the sound had died down and everyone had to face her. The slowly dawning looks of horror on some of their faces were her favorites. Oh yeah, she still had it.

 

“Shut that music off,” she called, gratified when two boys ran to do what she had asked. It took a moment but when they were done, Emma stepped forward to the center of the clearing. It was a risky move, putting some of these kids at her back and Emma wouldn’t have done with any other situation. But these were kids she knew, had seen around town. They weren’t dangerous magical beings from the Enchanted Forest. They were the children of those dangerous beings. They had mostly all grown up in Storybrooke, not exactly with Henry - most of these kids were younger than him - but around him, participating in the same school plays and sitting through a million assemblies. So she was going to give them a choice, because it was her wedding day and she was feeling…generous. Yes, generous, not lazy at all.

 

Emma was still going to take the moment to instill a little healthy fear of Storybrooke’s Sheriff in them. She put a little extra swagger into her step as she walked, and rested one hand on the gun in her holster. She had a sword in the patrol car for problems that required a more specific solution, but when she was here in Storybrooke, she still favored her gun. There was something satisfying about using it to break up Theseus and the Minotaur. Or you know, Aladdin and Jafar.

 

“You all know who I am,” Emma declared. There were groans and nods and several people started talking all at once. Emma held her hand up quickly to cut them off. If the situation fell into chaos, she would never get them back to where she wanted. “And if you know that, then you know that today’s my wedding day. To the Evil Queen.” Emma managed not to wince. She hated using that title for Regina now and never did, but if leaning on her soon-to-be-wife’s badass reputation would get her out of here and little faster - and Regina never found out - it might be worth it.

 

Looking around the clearing, Emma met the eyes of everyone that she could, letting them see just how unamused she would and encouraging them with the weight of her gaze to imagine just how unhappy Regina would be if she was late to her own wedding because of this mess. “Thing is, I don’t really want to be out here. So how about you all just pack up your vehicles, find someone who isn’t drunk to drive you, and go home. So I don’t have to deal with this to-” Her attention had still been drifting across the crowd as she spoke, out of habit more than anything else. Her gaze landed on a teenage boy - a head shorter than those around him, scrawny and with a shock of blonde hair - his eyes widened with fear. Puzzled, Emma cocked her head, trying to figure out why he was so frightened. Light exploded out of his hand in a shower of multi-colored sparks. It wasn’t directed at her from what Emma could tell, just an explosion of color and sound.

 

“Okay, you need to get that under control,” Emma started to say, moving forward to push her way through the crowd to him. She wasn’t sure who he was - though she’d seen him around town before - or what his powers were. But he looked more frightened of what he had done than anything else. His eyes comically wide as he stared at his hands. The look on his face when he saw her coming was worse. He didn’t wait to see what she was about to say and do. He bolted.

 

“Shit,” Emma swore as she tore after him. The moment they both lurched into motion, the crowd scattered, everyone running in different directions. At first they were just scrambling to get out of Emma and the boy’s way. The moment he had started running, he had started leaking magic again, pouring out of him in fits and starts. Then people started ducking for their cars. A girl slipped, someone screamed and the whole thing dissolved into chaos. Emma slowed enough to yank the girl to her feet and then dove back in the direction the boy had gone.

  
She slammed into him as she charged around the corner of a pickup truck. His wide eyes looked just as startled as she was. Emma had an instant to realize he had probably been trying to hide from her around there, taking advantage of her distraction, before magic exploded in her face. The light was so brilliant it blinded her. Emma threw her arm up instinctively to protect herself, flinging up a magical shield with it, but she was too late. His magic slammed into her, throwing her into the air. Emma had a half-second to try and stop it or slow it, but the necessary concentration slipped through her fingers. She hit the ground hard, her head snapping back as she landed and smacked into a boulder with a sickening crunch. Pain exploded behind her eyes and darkness consumed her. 


	4. iii.

_Henry slammed the front door behind him, toeing off his shoes and bounding up the short flight of stairs to the main floor. “Mom?” He bellowed. “Is everything okay? Ma’s car is out front.”_

_“No yelling in the house, young man,” Regina said, stepping out of her study. “And, no, everything is fine.”_

_“But Ma is here?” Henry continued. He didn’t mean to be worried. He wasn’t worried. It was just his Mom had been plenty pissed about that whole Emma bringing Marian back to Storybrooke and ruining her chance at True Love with Robin thing. She hadn’t told him. Lying to him was something she never did now, but sometimes, on rare occasions, she would refuse to discuss something with him. The first time she had done it, it had hurt. It had taken him awhile to realize it was because he was surprised by the refusal more than anything else. He had gotten used to his Mom being an open book to him - even if she was still as opaque as ever to the rest of the town. His hurt hadn’t last long, however. It hadn’t taken him that long to realize that she deserved secrets and thoughts of her own. Just because she was willing to tell him everything to gain his trust again, didn’t mean he always had to know._

_“She is,” Regina confirmed. “We’re in the study. Why don’t you come in before you start on your homework?”_

_“Okay,” Henry agreed. He slipped his arm around Regina’s waist and tucked his head against her side. Instead of calming his nerves, it only increased them. Regina was tense against him and when she laid her arm across his shoulders in return, she was as stiff as a board. She gave him a smile that was meant to be reassuring, but he could see the faint lines at the corner of her eyes. They only appeared when she was tense and nervous about something. “Mom,” he started._

_She pulled him close into her, holding him tight, and kissed the top of his forehead. “We just want to talk to you, Henry. It’s nothing to be worried about.”_

_“Yeah? It’s just you guys don’t really talk any more. Not, you know, to me - together.” A horrible, horrible thought occurred to him. “This isn’t The Talk, right, Mom? I swear, I don’t need it. Emma did it while we were in New York City and we had that sex ed class.”_

_Regina’s eyes narrowed as she looked down at him. “Nice try, young man. But there’s no way that Emma had that conversation while you were away.” Her eyes darted over to where Emma sat on the couch as they stepped into the room. “She would have put it off as long as possible until there was some chance of you getting a girl-” Her nose wrinkled. “-knocked up.”_

_“Would not,” Emma said, standing up to greet them as they came in, pulling Henry into her to wrap him into another hard hug. Both of his Moms were being extra touchy-feely today and that was worrying Henry too. Not the easy affection. That was pretty much normal these days, but the intensity of the hugs and the way that they held him a second too long, like they were worried that he would slip away from them. That had mostly faded in the months after Zelena was defeated and his memories returned. “I’m too young to be a grandmother.” Emma smirked at Regina. “You on the other hand…”_

_“Not a word, Miss Swan,” Regina cut in, pinning her with a glare that would have left a mere mortal shaking in their boots. Emma didn’t seem phased and the faint hint of amusement in Regina’s smile meant she wasn’t really angry with Emma. For the first time, Henry felt like he could relax, like maybe things would be okay._

_"So what do you want to tell me?" Henry asked, curiosity and nerves still getting the best of him. It wasn't good when people wanted to talk. Most of the time it meant something bad or something he really wasn't going to like had happened, but the way his Mom had looked at Emma. Maybe things between them were finally okay again._

_"Uh..." Emma looked petrified. "You see, kid..." She glanced over at Regina for support. To Henry's surprise she looked just as nervous as Emma, her face blank and her lips pursed together. "Your mom and I...we made this decision." Emma was still looking at Regina but addressing him. Henry wished he could figure out where this was going because he didn't get it yet. The sinking feeling in his stomach wasn't getting any better though. "We thought you deserved to know first before we told anyone else."_

_It was settling in now - the reason they were talking to him like this. The pained smiles, the outward agreement undermined by his moms clear tension with one another, the way they had both held onto him too tightly, it all made sense now. He remembered why this felt familiar and reacted like a cornered animal. Henry wouldn't let either of them do this again. He whirled to look at Regina. "You promised! You said you'd never let me go away again."_

_"Henry," Regina drew back, looking as if she had been slapped. "I'm not letting you go. I'm not going anywhere."_

_He shifted his attention to Emma. "So it's you? I can't believe you're leaving. You said you wouldn't, that this was home now." He glanced back and forth between both of them. "I know things suck right now, but you can't make me choose. Please don't, Mom." He wasn't sure which one of them he was asking maybe both of them._

_"No, Henry," Regina said, dropping down to her knees in front of him and taking his hands. "We're not leaving and we're not making you choose. Emma and I won't do that to you again." She looked up at Emma and Henry followed her gaze. Emma squatted down beside them and put a hand on both of their shoulders. Her grip was as firm and warm and comforting as the way his mom ran her thumbs over the back of his hand._

_"She's right, kid. We're working stuff out now. We won't put you in the middle anymore. We promised." Emma pressed her lips to the top of his head. "I'm sorry we ever did that to you."_

_“Henry, why did you think one of us was leaving?” Regina asked._

_Henry sniffed and wished he didn't feel like crying. He was almost thirteen. He was supposed to be strong, a prince and almost a man. Not crying like a baby. He wasn't even sure why he felt this way. Everything was so messed up. “The way you looked just now was the same way you looked that day, at the line. When the curse was coming.”_

_“Oh, Henry,” Regina murmured in a low voice, reaching up to cup her cheek in his hand. “No.”_

_Emma shrugged. “It kinda makes sense actually. That’s when it started. Or…” His Mom was looking at Emma again and Emma seemed to wither a little under her gaze. “Not when it started, but when I noticed it, I guess.”_

_Regina let go of his hand and reached up behind her to lay her hand over the one Emma had on her shoulder. Henry expected her to brush it away but she didn't. Instead Emma flipped her hand over and laced their fingers together. Regina smiled and it broke Henry's heart.  It was sweet, wistful and tentative and Henry couldn't figure out what it meant. "Mom?" He needed to know now what they were going to say, what they were so worried about, if they weren't trying to tell him they were all going to be ripped apart again._

_Regina looked back at him, that smile never leaving her face. "You know your mother's been trying to apologize to me?"_

_Henry swallowed and nodded. It had been hard to miss. Emma had even tried baking once. That attempt hadn’t made it to Regina. The sodden, burnt mess wouldn’t exactly have sent the right message. That and Henry was pretty sure it would have given her food poisoning if she’d tried to eat it._

_“I told her to stop,” Regina said, glancing back at Emma, who still looked pained._

_“Why?” Henry asked, drawn out of his worry by curiosity._

_“Because it was pointless.” Regina answered. Henry winced. It wasn’t what he had been hoping for. He knew why his Mom was mad. He got it. He did. He had even been a little mad too. He had liked the way his Mom looked when she was with Robin. He made her smile and look happy, almost carefree. She had been happy with Henry too, when it had just been the two of them. They had been happy together before he had found out that he was adopted, but she had so rarely been carefree. It felt good to see her like that. He had hoped that someday, she might forgive Emma though. It had been really nice when they were getting along - safe and warm and comfortable like nothing else._

_Emma winced again. “I’m still sorry though.”_

_“I know, dear," Regina said, like it was habit. Henry didn’t miss the fondness that lay beneath it. "It was pointless," Regina continued. "Because it didn't change anything. But eventually I discovered that I wasn't as upset about those changes as I had been."_

_"Oh?" That was news to Henry. He hadn't missed the hurt look on his Mom's face the last time she had seen Robin and Marian together at Granny's. Robin had doted on Marian and refused to meet Regina's eyes. It had been Marian who spoke as they walked past Henry and Regina's table on their way out._

_"Yes. Tinkerbell told me once that Robin was my soulmate and perhaps he would have been. But I'm no longer that woman."_

_"Okay. So what does that mean?" Henry asked._

_"I'm not certain, dear. But I'm trying to figure that out." Regina glanced over at Emma and then back to Henry. "With your mother."_

_"So she's helping you?" Henry clarified. It was great, his moms working together again. It was more than he could have asked for._

_"More like it's something we're exploring together." Regina said._

_"Together-" A possibility was beginning to take shape in Henry's mind, but surely she couldn't mean that. Not after all the fights, the tug-of-Henry, Cora's death, Neverland, the year in New York City and hurting the thing she'd had with Robin. But he had to ask. "Together?" His voice cracked over the last word and Henry flushed._

_This time, it was Emma who answered. "Yeah, kid. Together-together."_

_Henry's cheeks burned as he glanced between the two of them. He didn't know what to say. Actually... "I thought you were with Hook."_

_Emma shook her head. "Not really. It turns out he was pretty jealous of all the time I was spending thinking about your Mom and trying to make up for what I'd done."_

_"So he broke up with you," Henry concluded._

_"No, actually I broke up with him," Emma corrected him. "He was right."_

_The annoyed look on Regina's face slipped, to be replaced with surprise. "I didn't know that."_

_Emma shrugged, like it was nothing. "You were pretty pissed at me - rightly so. Bringing her back without knowing who she was or the consequences for keeping her alive... Hell, for all I knew that day, her destiny might have meant being rescued by someone else before she was executed. Just because Robin thought she was dead at the time, there were a lot of possibilities he might not have known about. A thousand other things could have happened. It’s impossible to know the past. What I could have done to the future…” She looked at Henry and shuddered. “I shouldn't have messed with that." She gave Regina a nod of acknowledgement. "And after everything I'd done to you, it didn't seem fair to put my feelings on you too."_

_"Thank you," Regina said. "I’m glad you’re terrible at hiding your feelings, dear.”_

_Emma grinned back. "Never been happier about it myself.”_

_"Henry?" His silence hadn't gone unnoticed by Regina, despite her momentary distraction with Emma._

_“Yeah,” he croaked, staring at a spot on the floor in front of him like he had never seen it before. He wasn’t ready to look up and meet either of his moms’ gazes._

_“Are you okay?” Regina’s thumb was still moving back and forth over the back of his hand. Henry had the sudden urge to jerk it away. Only the memory of all the times he had done it before and the look on her face afterwards stopped him. It made him sick just remembering it. He shook his head and took a step back._

_“I don’t get it,” he said, still shaking his head, as if the act alone would clear his thinking._

_“We didn’t either, kid,” Emma tried. “Not for a long time. But,” she shared another glance with Regina and tried to smile at him. It came out more tentative than she had probably intended. “Your mom makes me happy and I think maybe I make her happy too. It’s good.”_

_“So you just decided to stop fighting and love each other like that?” Henry demanded. He had wanted them to get along but not this. This was weird and he wasn’t sure how he was supposed to feel about it._

_“Whoa!” Emma exclaimed. “Nobody said anything about love, kid. Not that there’s anything wrong with that,” she backpedaled. “It’s just-” She shot Regina a terrified look. "A little help here?"_

_"No, dear," Regina said, smiling back with the smile that wasn't one at all. "I think you're handling this magnificently. Do continue."_

_Emma glared and Henry laughed. It was good to see that some things hadn't changed. It made him feel better. He slapped his hand over his mouth as they both turned to look at him. "Sorry," he mumbled trying to look chastened. The last thing he needed was to end up grounded. He and Paige had been talking and maybe, maybe he had convinced her to catch a movie with him Saturday night. He couldn't drive yet without one of his moms' and he didn't want them along. But he had his bike and walking could be romantic right? He had heard that somewhere. Maybe he'd ask Emma. No Emma and his mom. Very bad thoughts. David, maybe or someone, anyone else._

_"I'm okay with it," Henry blurted out. "Can I go to my room?"_

_For a moment, it looked as if his Mom might object but then she gave a little nod. "Very well."_

_Henry slung his backpack back up on his shoulder and ducked out of the room before he could get called back. He was just about to charge up the stairs when he stopped, pressing himself back up against the wall beside the door to the study._

_"Regina?" He heard Emma's voice, gentler than he had ever known her to speak to Regina and a little bit nervous._

_There was no verbal reply. Henry didn't move and then, when there had been no sound for a long moment, he couldn't resist any longer. Crouching down, he peaked around the corner. His mother stood with her arms wrapped around Emma's neck and her head pressed into Emma's shoulder._

_"Did you believe him?" Regina asked, raising her head to look at Emma._

_Emma grimaced and shook her head. "Too easy. He just wanted to get out of here." Her hands shifted from Regina's hips, running up and down her sides. "How-" She bit her lips and paused. “I know he's the most important thing in the world to you. To me too. Are you-"_

_Regina smiled. It looked fragile and Henry hated himself for putting it there. "I don't know. This is important to me. I wouldn't have let it happen otherwise. But if Henry... I changed to be who he needed me to be. If he can't accept this..." Something strange flickered over her face, remembrance and bitterness._

_Emma ducked her head to catch Regina's eye. "You deserve to be happy too."_

_"And you, of course, would have no stake in that." Regina said, that strangeness slipping away to be replaced by her familiar dry tone._

_"Oh, I've got stake, Lady," Emma said, tugging Regina closer. "Lots and lots of stake. I want to see you and Henry happy. Both of you," she emphasized._

_His mom was smiling again, leaning toward Emma as if she were being drawn in and looking as if she couldn't believe what she was seeing before her. Henry realized she was about to kiss Emma and jerked back, slamming into the wall. He didn't wait to see if they had heard him and dove for the stairs, taking them two at a time until he was safe in his room, the door slamming shut behind him._

_***    ***    ***_

_That night, his Mom came to tuck him in. It wasn’t something that she had done in a while. His bedtime had gotten later and story time slipped away to working together at the dining room table or separately with him in his room and her in her study. It was comforting, though, the way she pulled the covers up to his chin and leaned over him to kiss his forehead, whispering that she loved him so very much._

_Henry couldn’t help himself. He reached out and grabbed her hand, grinning at her. He had been thinking about the storybook tonight and thinking about them. “You know, Mom, it makes a pretty amazing story, you and Emma. Adopting me, me finding her. You guys fighting and breaking the curse and saving me. Then falling for each other."_

_“Oh, Henry,” Regina sighed, but it was as fond as it was weary. “You know, this isn’t a story - not anymore. It’s our lives, mine and Emma’s and yours. And Emma and I are very capable of messing this up. We aren’t guaranteed anything, let alone a-”_

_“A happy ending?” Henry supplied, when she couldn’t say it._

_Regina nodded, pressing her lips together tightly to keep back the moisture welling in her eyes. “Yes, dear, that.”_

_“I know, Mom,” Henry said, confidence in what he was saying shining through in every word. “But you shouldn’t be afraid of it. You deserve it. You both do.”_

_Regina cupped his cheek with her hand and shook her head. “You are the best thing to have happened to me.”_

_Henry flushed but surged up in bed to throw his arms around her, clinging to her. “You too, Mom.”_

 

 


	5. iii.

Emma was running late. Ruby had just called from the venue to let her know. Despite what Emma had promised, Regina wasn't surprised. She knew the woman she was marrying after all. It didn't make her any more patient however.

 

She slapped her phone into Henry's palm and instructed, "Call your grandmother and find out where your mother is. Tell her if she's gotten cold feet-" The dire threat should have followed was lost in a quick, sharp inhale. "Tell her she doesn't dare. I will never forgive her."

 

Henry's fingers curled over hers, warm and reassuring. Regina hadn't realized how cold her hands were until he did. "Right, yeah, not gonna tell her that," he muttered. "But I will find out where she is. She'll be here, Mom."

 

Regina nodded curtly and turned away. It was all she could do. The thought of Emma not making it to their wedding, choosing not to be there, was one she couldn’t bear. She drifted out of the room and up the stairs into the room she and Emma shared. It seemed strange now to think of the way it had been for almost three decades. There was _clutter_. Emma’s things were everywhere. Her necklace hung from the top post of the mirror in the corner of the room and her red leather jacket was tossed over the corner of the bed. One dirty sock lay limply over the edge of the laundry hamper and empty hangers stuck out at odd angles around Regina’s neatly hung suits and perfectly pressed slacks.

 

There was a picture of the three of them - taken at Henry’s high school graduation - jammed into the mirror frame. In the picture, Emma had her arms around both of them, draped around their shoulders and pulling them close. Henry’s arm faded into nothingness in the foreground as he held the camera. Emma had a goofy expression on her face and an adoring look in her eyes for their son. When Emma had first shoved the picture in there, Regina had refused to allow it. Pictures were for frames, not crammed into other furnishings. Every time Regina went to take it down, she had been struck by the happiness that shown out of the Henry’s eyes and the contentment on her own features. There was no tightness around her eyes, no strained political smile, just a moment of ease and happiness with the two people she loved the most. She had never gotten around to taking it down and despite what she might say to Emma, Regina knew she never would. It was here to stay.

 

“Mom.” Henry pushed the door open a few inches, then hesitated, waiting for her response before he entered.

 

Unbidden a smile slid over Regina’s lips. Henry had learned the habit of knocking when he was fifteen and had spilled into the bedroom without doing so one afternoon after school, excitedly chattering to her about some activity. To his horror, he had found his mothers frozen, but still mostly unclothed and wrapped around each other. He hadn’t been able to look her in the eye for a week. Every time he had looked at Emma, he had blushed and then blanched so hard his skin turned a sickly, grey color.

 

“Come in, dear,” Regina said, patting the spot beside her on the chaise lounge where she had sunk down moments before. She wrapped her arm through Henry’s, pulling him close, when he sat. “What did your grandmother say?”

 

Henry sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “She said Emma got a call. It seemed like no big deal but she was looking for an excuse to bail.” He tensed the moment the words were out of his mouth. “God, Mom. On the primping, and you know, the girly stuff and Grandma being all crazy about True Love and happiness and stuff. Not the day.”

 

“I know that, Henry,” Regina said, covering his arm reassuringly with her hand. “I do,” she repeated, when he shot her a glance out of the corner of his eyes. “There was a time when Emma might have run from anything that resembled seriousness or commitment, but now she would at least do me the courtesy of telling me first. No, I suspect something’s happened to your mother.”

 

Henry snorted. “You realize you only call her ‘your mother’ when you think she’s done something stupid, right?”

 

Regina let out a startled laugh, her nails digging into his arm for an instant. “I suppose I do. A habit from when she...irritated me far more than she does now. Reminding myself of who she was to you was not pleasant, but I knew that hurting her would hurt you and that was the last thing I wanted to do.”

 

“I know, Mom,” Henry said, covering her hand with his for a moment. “So we’re going to go find her?”

 

“Knowing your mother, she’ll have already rescued herself by the time we get there,” Regina said it deliberately this time, with a mixture of fondness and irritation.

 

“Just in time for you to yell at her for doing something stupid,” Henry agreed. “Today of all days.”

 

Regina smirked. “Of course.” She rose and held her hand out to him. He took it without hesitation but didn’t put any pressure on her as he rose to his feet. The older he had become, the more protective of her Henry had grown. Regina suspected it was another thing he had picked up from Emma. It could be irritating at times, but she never said anything to him, the small gestures of caring worth more to her than all the gold or power in the world. “Henry,” Regina brushed the tips of her fingers over his elbow to stop him.

 

He tilted his head up to her in question, looking so much like Emma with his arched brows and quizzical expression that it made her heart ache. “Yeah, Mom?”

 

“Have I ever thanked you?” Regina asked him, her words stretching out as she became lost in thought for a moment.

 

“Sure, earlier this morning, when I convinced Grandma it wasn’t necessary to come over and check on you,” Henry teased.

 

Regina tapped him on the elbow, and shook her head. “Not what I meant, young man.”

 

He grinned, sheepish and unrepentant. “Sorry. Go on.”

 

Regina drew in a deep breath and squeezed his hand. “Thank you for going to find Emma. I’m sorry that I hurt you so badly that you needed to, but I can’t imagine our lives without her now.”

 

Without a word, Henry flung his arms around her. He was taller than her now, taller than all of his parents, but he was no longer skinny. Somehow he had inherited Charming’s broad shoulders instead of Baelfire’s compact build and when he engulfed her in a hug, it was with nothing held back. He clung to her as fiercely as he had as a small boy, neither ashamed nor frightened of who she was. Regina treasured every moment. “My little prince, all grown up,” she murmured, stroking the hair at the nape of his neck.

 

“Not so little anymore,” Henry agreed. “But always your prince,” he added as he let her go. “Now let’s go find Ma.”

 

***     ***     ***

 

The Storybrooke General Hospital Emergency Room was quiet. Late afternoon sun drifted in through the windows, warming Emma’s room and giving the whole thing a hazy, golden air that made her want to drift off to sleep. The way her head was throbbing seemed to counter that for the most part. It didn’t seem to be having the same soothing effect on Regina though. She sat, back straight and head raised, motionless as she stared out the window, in a chair by Emma’s bed.

 

“Hey,” Emma said, keeping her voice quiet as she held out her arm and waggled her fingers at Regina.

 

Startled, Regina glanced over at her, worry clouding her features and tightening the lines around her eyes, as she rose from her seat and stepped toward Emma. She took Emma's hand without any further prompting but her grip was loose.

 

"You're quiet," Emma said, turning her hand over in Regina's until she could drag her closer and pull her down on the bed beside her.

 

"What do you want me to say, dear?" Regina asked, sounding tired.

 

"I'm sorry," Emma said.

 

Regina's head shot up. "What have I done to apologize for?"

 

"What?" Emma blurted, then realized how her comments had been misinterpreted. "No, nothing. I meant, I'm sorry. For ruining today for you. I fucked up. I shouldn't have gone out on that call. I wasn't trying to, you know, bail or anything. I just couldn't take another minute of Snow and veils and rainbows and unicorns."

 

"Yes, well." Regina cleared her throat, but didn't say anything else.

 

"I didn’t intend to get knocked out by some kid just coming into his magic for the first time and trying to show off for a bunch of teenage girls. I want to marry you," Emma said. “More than anything.” It felt as if something undefinable was slipping through her fingers but she couldn't find the words to say or even figure out where this was all going wrong. The feeling that she was in danger of losing one of the most important people in her life wouldn't go away though.

 

"I should go," Regina said, easing her hand out of Emma's grip and standing. "If we aren't...there are arrangements to be made. Things to be cancelled. I'm sure Snow has already begun but she shouldn't have to take care of it all herself."

 

"Since when are you-" Emma started.

 

"Since the moment I decided I valued my son more than my desire for anger and vengeance and chose to become a good person," Regina said, pinning Emma with a glare that dared Emma to continue.

 

Emma raised her hands in surrender. "I'm sorry. That was out of line. I didn't mean it like...." She stared down at her folded hands, itching to get up and out of this room, out of the stupid hospital gown that the nurse had forced her to put on when Regina had brought her in. "You'll let me know how David and Henry are doing with the kid?" There was no doubt in Emma's mind that Regina would check in on Henry as soon as she was out of the hospital. Henry, who had wanted to stay with him until his parents came when they had realized that was all he was, a teenager scared by all the power that was suddenly at his fingertips. His attack on Emma hadn’t been intentional, and as it hadn’t left Emma more than a little battered, they had decided to release him to his parents custody. On the provision - Regina’s provision - that he come to her and no one else to learn how to control his magic. The lessons would continue until Regina was satisfied that he could control himself and his magic. It would have been more terrifying to Emma than the jail time, but the boy had seemed relieved.

 

"Of course, dear," Regina said, already turning away to leave.

 

"Regina?" Emma called just as she was about to step out of the room. Worry gnawed at her. Her stomach roiled with it.

 

Regina hesitated and turned, arching her brows at Emma in question.

 

"We don't have to cancel it. The wedding, I mean. We could still do it today. I was only out of it for a second. I feel fine." Regina's eyes narrowed and her lips pursed into a thin line in disbelief. "Okay, okay," Emma admitted. "This headache sucks, but it's not that bad. I can't deliver on that crazy, sexy wedding night but I can promise you some quality slow dancing. If you want."

 

“Emma,” Regina sighed and sagged against the doorframe, leaning her forehead against it. She let her eyes close for a moment and Emma started struggling to kick the blankets off her feet. If Regina was letting herself be this vulnerable in public then something was very wrong. Regina straightened while Emma was still fighting to get the epic heaps of blankets off her. How many damn layers were there? “You’re sweet, but we should wait, dear. There’s no need to settle.”

 

“Are you kidding?” Emma said, ignoring her current nemesis for the moment. “Marrying you? That could never be settling.” Finally, Emma managed to tug herself free and swing her legs over the side of the bed. She took a moment, planting her hands on either side of her on the bed to push herself up. Everything swayed worryingly before Emma caught herself, but she thought she covered it pretty well, lurching into motion to hide the way she wobbled. She leaned - okay, fell in a controlled manner - against the door beside Regina and summoned a lopsided smile, crossing her arms over her chest. “You and Henry are the best thing that ever happened to me.”

 

Regina smiled, but it was faint. “I feel the same. So perhaps we should stay with what works. Weren’t we happy enough before?”

 

Emma couldn’t help the way she flinched at Regina’s words. She tried to cover it with bravado. “Hey, you’re the one that asked me. What changed your mind?”

 

Regina let out a small huff that might have been a laugh. “Temporary insanity?”

 

“Nah,” Emma shook her head. “I don’t believe that. I know you too well. You never do anything without a plan.”

 

“I do. Sometimes,” Regina qualified, her expression distant, lost in thought of some other place and time. “I can be very impulsive.”

 

“Oh yeah?” Emma said, trying to sound casual. She wasn’t really following what Regina was saying. The way her head was throbbing was making any kind of serious thinking difficult, but something told her this wasn’t a discussion she wanted to table for later. It might not happen at all then.

 

“Yes,” Regina agreed, her voice dropping even softer. “When my mother…” Regina shook her head and started again. “When I was to marry the king, I decided to run, Daniel and I together. There’s was no plan, no map for the future, no knowledge of where we might go or how we would hide from my mother - or the king. We just went.”

 

“And your mother…” Emma couldn’t make herself finish the sentence. She didn’t want to see the look on Regina’s face at yet another reminder of Daniel’s death. Not out of jealousy, but that kind of pain left Regina flayed open and vulnerable in a way Emma never wanted to be responsible for inflicting. Not again.

 

“Yes.” Regina agreed, holding herself very still.

 

“This is different,” Emma said, before she could stop herself.

 

“Of course it is,” Regina snapped, pushing back from the door and straightening. “Don’t you think I know that?”

 

Emma bit her lip to keep from snapping back, her arms pressed to her ribs now, holding more than defiantly crossed. She didn’t drop her eyes from Regina’s. “I meant your mom isn’t here. She’s not…” Emma shook her head. “She can’t do anything, Regina.”

 

“And yet, you still managed to get your head split open on the very day we were to be married,” Regina said, taking an unconscious step closer to Emma. “If you had fallen just a little bit harder, been a little bit nearer when his magic exploded, you would be dead, Emma.”

 

“But I wasn’t,” Emma pointed out, starting to feel stubborn about it.

 

“The people that I love die,” Regina said, biting out the words as if they would choke her.

 

"Okay," Emma said, sudden certainty replacing everything else. "So we don't get married."

 

Regina eyed her warily. "What do you mean?"

 

"I mean if you don't want to do this, no way are we going to," Emma said with a shrug.

 

"I know how much you wanted this," Regina said, eyes narrowing. “I hurt you, when I said no. I don’t want to do that to you again.”

 

Emma sighed and ran a hand through her hair in frustration. “You didn’t hurt me. You said no. You had every right to.” She looked down, poking at a crack in the industrial flooring with a bare toe. “I went to see Archie after that.”

 

“You did?” Regina sounded surprised despite herself.

 

“Yeah.” Emma still didn’t look up. She wasn’t sure she could say this and look at Regina. It was embarrassing, even if it had happened years ago. “I hated it. You said no so fast. I was embarrassed. I wanted you to take me seriously and I wanted you to want me. Archie pointed out that I was confusing the issue. I was running. I took it as a ‘no’ to everything. That you didn’t really want me.” Emma grimaced. “Archie said those were my abandonment issues talking.” She made little sarcastic air quotes with her fingers. Some conversations couldn’t be had seriously. A little sarcasm and making light was necessary just to get through them. “Being pissed off with you about it was me being self-destructive, pushing you away before you could tell me you didn’t want to be in a relationship at all.”

 

“That’s not what I wanted,” Regina admitted.

 

“Yeah,” Emma conceded. “I got that eventually when you didn’t break up with me, or kick me out.”

 

“I wouldn’t have,” Regina said quickly. “Even then, I don’t think I could have. I was terrified of losing you. If I had thought even for a moment before I spoke, I would have answered differently.”

 

Emma reached out, hesitating to give Regina a chance to pull away before she took her hand, sliding their fingers together as if they were made for each other. “Then I’m glad you didn’t. I wouldn’t want you to be with me just because you were scared I’d walk away if you didn’t. That’s not how...it wouldn’t have been right. I want us to be right - to be good for each other.”

 

“I want that too,” Regina said, nodding her agreement through a pained smile. “How do we do that?”

 

Emma shrugged. "I’m not sure, really. I just know I want you to be happy. If you want me to be apart of your life - to be with you - even better. ‘Cause I love you.” Saying the words, even now, after ten years together, made Emma feel shy. Her cheeks warmed even as she tried to ignore it. She had to get it out. There were things she needed to say before she chickened out again, before she dismissed it as not being that important because it had all happened a long time ago.  “For a long time I didn't care how I hurt you. I didn't even notice that I had. I was so desperate for a second chance with Henry, that I was willing to do whatever it took to be in his life. I’m so sorry for what I did, for taking him away from you. I shouldn’t have done that. It was wrong.”

 

“Thank you,” Regina said, her lips twisting up. “I’m not sure about that, but I appreciate you saying it.”  

 

“I mean it,” Emma said, squeezing her hands. She leaned her forehead against Regina’s. “There’s so much I wish I’d done differently.” She took a deep breath. “But I can’t change what I did then. Now I just want you to be happy and if that means I'm not a part of your life or we never get married then that's okay."

 

Regina knuckles whitened. "And if I said I no longer wanted you in my life, you would just walk away?"

 

Emma paled and swallowed. "Yeah," she agreed roughly. "It would really suck, but I would respect what you wanted." She shrugged. "Or try to, really hard. I'm not perfect."

  
"Yes, I know, dear," Regina said dryly. She turned Emma’s hand over in hers and brought it to her lips. “But I think I have a better idea. I don’t want to wait anymore.” 


	6. ii.

_The knock on Regina's door was soft, two brief, staccato strokes that sent Regina's heart lurching into her throat. This was a farce - and one that had the potential to be disastrous. Regina had no idea why she had agreed to it in the first place. Her dress felt too tight, and the material, which had seemed so lush and sensual when she put it on, felt scratchy against her thighs. If she was going to put an end to this farce now - which she was - she should have changed again first. This dress was inappropriate for turning down a date with someone. This dress was--  The knock sounded again._

_Regina's palms were damp. She curtailed the urge to brush them against her thighs. This dress was far too lovely to ruin with sweat stains. Curling her hands into fists, Regina strode toward the door, took a deep breath and pulled it open. "Miss Swan." Instead of looking at Emma, she focused her attention on a spot just over Emma's left shoulder. It was safer that way._

_"Hey, Regina." It was hard to miss the way that Emma stood so awkwardly, shifting from one foot to the other as she was. "You look...I mean, wow. That dress is...you're beautiful." The wonder in her voice caught Regina and she glanced over at Emma before she could stop herself. She wore a little black dress, sleeveless and leaving one shoulder bare. It came down to just above the knee and managed to capture elegance and grace, the lines of Emma's dress flattering her figure without being overly revealing. It was far more tasteful than Regina would have expected._

_"So do you, dear," the words slipped out before Regina could stop them. "You look lovely." This wasn't what she was supposed to be saying. The plan had been to greet Emma and then turn her away, sending her home with Regina's regrets and a vague declaration that this wouldn't work at all._

_"Thanks," Emma sounded uncomfortable again, but she was holding her hand out to Regina now. "Are you ready to go? I know I'm a little early," Emma added in apology._

_"Punctuality is never something to apologize for," Regina said. She hadn't been expecting Emma to show up this early, in point of fact, but it was a pleasant surprise. Not that she had hoped to be pleasantly surprised, but Emma had exceeded her expectation. She still needed to turn her down. These confusing feelings that she had been having, they were just the after effect of her brief affair with Robin, all tangled up with how Emma's actions had brought it to an end._

_Emma was Henry's mother and an important person in her own life because of that. That was all. This was just ridiculous. Indulging in such things wasn't worth the difficulty or complications, in her life or Henry's. She and Emma were back in a good place at last. She no longer wanted to start throwing fireballs or plot some elaborate doom every time she saw the woman. She shouldn't tempt fate by going out on a date with her. Things could only get worse from there. And yet..._

_Emma's hand wavered where she had held it out, her fingers curling in on themselves and then dropping back to her side. Emma's cheeks flushed and she looked down and away from Regina. Now was the time to say something, to tell Emma this was a mistake and she wouldn't be going. Regina opened her mouth and, "Just a moment. I forgot my bag,” fell out._

_"Sure, right," Emma said, taking a step back. "I'll just wait. Right here."_

_With the barest hint of a smile in Emma's direction, Regina shut the door and let herself sag against it. What was she thinking? She couldn't possibly considering going with Emma. Just because she had been surprisingly prompt, charming in her own awkward way and offered a sweet and not sleazy compliment when she had arrived, it wasn't a good enough reason to jeopardize their renewed friendship. That's what she would tell Emma. Emma would understand. It was all for Henry. That was the only way they could make this odd tangle of co-parenting that they had going to work. She couldn't really have feelings for Emma, could she? It was just a relief not to hate her anymore and she had confused that relief for something more, something besides a mere truce, a cessation of hostilities._

_Regina straightened, tugging down at the hem of her dress and opened the door. "Miss Swan-" And Emma smiled. It stopped the words she had been about to say in her throat and hit her heart with a pang she hadn't expected._

_"Ready?" Emma asked with enough hope in her voice that it made Regina ache. Regina knew, then, that she couldn't say it. Her hands were shaking and she felt dazed and nerve-wracked._

_"I, no. It seems I forgot my..." Regina shook her head and ducked back in the door. This was ridiculous. Her clutch was on the table beside the door. She grabbed it and stepped back out. "I'm ready," Regina said, even if she wasn't. Emma was grinning as she did, holding out her arm out for Regina again. Regina took it, offering her own tentative smile as she did. Emma's skin was cool with the faint chill of the night air, but Regina could feel the warmth beneath it. There was something about the firm muscles beneath her fingers that was solid and reassuring. Emma wouldn't let her fall. Regina held on a little tighter, rubbing her fingers over the soft skin of Emma's forearm. Emma glanced over at her, surprise and pleasure flickering across her face at the little gesture. She put her free hand over Regina's and left it there until they reached the car. With a bemused grin, Emma swept the door open for Regina and gave a little bow as she did. "Your Majesty."_

_Regina found herself smiling despite herself. "Thank you." Her lips quirked up again. "Although it's not, perhaps, the type of conveyance worthy of a queen."_

_"Yeah, yeah," Emma muttered. "What is it with you and the Bug? Does it really offend your sensibilities that badly? I mean, you're not even from this world. What did it ever do to you?" she teased._

_Regina snorted. "Its mere existence is an affront, dear. When vehicles such as Mercedes Benz exist and you choose to drive something that old and poorly cared for, well..." Regina let her words trail off._

_Emma laughed. "I didn't know you were such a car nerd."_

_Regina shrugged and gave her an enigmatic smile as she sank into the car. "There's many things you don't know about me, dear."_

_"Yeah," Emma said, as she started to ease the door shut. "I'm starting to get that." She hesitated, looking at Regina with so much fondness in her eyes that Regina had to look away. "But I want to know more. Whatever you want to tell me."_

_"Even if what I have to say is hard to hear?" Regina asked, tilting her head up at Emma. Her words were sweet, but meaningless until they were backed up by actions. "We haven't always been the best of friends and I haven't changed simply because you realized I’m attractive. I won't hide who I am or pretend to be someone that I am not for you."_

_"I didn’t just realize,” Emma protested, but then she was kneeling awkwardly in her dress and heels, so she was no longer looming over Regina. “And it's more than that. But okay. Tell me something hard."_

_Anger flashed in Regina's heart, a bright, vivid explosion there and gone. It hadn't been her intent to have this discussion - or any like it - but Emma had asked. "You had no right to Henry when you came to Storybrooke. It was a closed adoption. He was well cared for and you didn't believe in the curse. You had no right to insinuate yourself into our lives and try to take him away from me."_

_Emma flinched like someone had struck her. Her face went pale and she swallowed hard. She looked down and Regina waited, waited for the argument and the denial to come tripping off Emma's tongue. She waited for this farce to end as quickly as it had begun. Emma looked back up, her bottom lip gone white, bitten between her teeth. "You're right." She sniffed and rubbed at her nose with the back of her hand. "I know it doesn't change anything I did then, but I'm sorry." She shook her head. "I'd have killed for a home like the one the kid has with you when I was a kid. When I think about what I did, trying to take him away from you, I can't... I don't like to think about that. It was so messed up. You're a good mom and I just didn't care, didn't look." She started to reach for Regina's hand but then curled her fingers and pulled her hand back. "I'm sorry."_

_"You were my worst, my most terrifying nightmare," Regina said. "Come to Storybrooke to break my curse and steal away the one person I loved. I couldn't let that happen again."_

_"No," Emma agreed. Her lips quirked up. "You showed impressive restraint."_

_Regina snorted, finding wry amusement beneath the anger. "It's so nice to be understood at last, Miss Swan."_

_Emma's smile faded again. "I know that's not the only time I hurt you. There's so much I regret doing, or at least going about it the way I did. I never apologized to you for not believing you when you said you hadn’t killed Archie. I knew and I just took the evidence, believed what I saw. Which is total bullshit and I shouldn’t have been stupid enough to let you take the fall for it. Especially not after what happened to me. I knew better but I didn’t give you the chance to prove yourself innocent. I’m so sorry for that. Things could have been so different."_

_Regina swallowed hard. How many years had she wasted thinking about ‘what ifs’ and ‘might-have-beens’. There was a time when she had gone over every hour of the day of Daniel's, death, turning it over and over in her mind to see what she had done wrong. There had to have been some way she could have prevented it. It was Regina's turn to reach out, her hand wrapping shakily around Emma's. "I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to be, dear."_

_"Yeah?" It was the closest Emma had gotten to an admission of want, desire and she couldn’t help but push, couldn’t help but read so much more into Regina’s words than what she was saying aloud. But that was just Emma, Regina knew._

_"Yes," Regina said firmly and with enough heat in her gaze that Emma's cheeks began to warm. "Now do you think you can shut this door? I believe I was invited to dinner."_

_***    ***    ***_

_"It's lovely," Regina said, taking in the restaurant with pleasant surprise. It inhabited a small space, but the warm light, diffused though it was, gave the place a cozy, intimate feel.  The chairs were made out of rich, deeply-colored wood, with slender elegant lines that went perfectly with the tables covered in thick, white linen table cloths, edged with the most delicate cutouts, and - if Regina wasn't mistaken - hand-embroidered._

_Emma’s hand brushed across the small of her back as they followed the maitre d’ to their table. “Thanks.” Emma’s voice sounded rough, a little bit nervous and far closer than Regina had expected her to be. She turned and caught Emma's eye. Emma flushed and Regina let a satisfied smile curve over her lips. Still grinning Regina brushed her fingers against the back of Emma's hand as she turned back around. She felt light, as if she were about to float away, and energized. Her skin tingled whenever they touched. “I try.”_

_"How did you find the place?" Regina asked when they had arrived at their table, allowing the maître d' to push her seat in for her, as she tried to regain her usual equilibrium. Emma allowed her seat to be pushed in as well but the gesture looked awkward on her._

_"I know people," Emma said, giving her an enigmatic smile. "Some of them owe me favors."_

_"And you decided to use one for this." Regina stated, arching a challenging brow._

_"Why not?" Emma asked, settling back in her chair, fiddling with the edge of the cloth napkin in front of her. "I wanted tonight to be special."_

_Regina settled back into her chair, folding her hands in her lap, and eyed Emma. "You seem to be doing a good job so far."_

_"Yeah?" Emma was looking up at her from under her lashes. It made something low in Regina's abdomen twist. She had the sudden urge to reach for Emma, to take her hand, to touch her._

_"Mmm," Regina said noncommittally, reaching for her menu instead of what she really wanted. "One selection only, dear?" Regina noted, perusing the menu with a critical eye. Instead of a variety of choices, there was on an elegantly printed selection presented. The golden letters embossed on the thick cardstock felt smooth beneath her thumb. "You must be feeling brave."_

_"Anybody can do surf and turf." Emma said, with a shrug, but Regina could see that her bravado didn't quite make it to her eyes. "They have a special dinner here, once a month. I thought you might enjoy it."_

_"But not you?" Regina queried, teasing Emma just a little. It was clear now, if it hadn't been before, that Emma had put time and thought into this date. No one, not even Robin, had tried so hard to capture attention and make her happy. With them, it had been easy, no effort required. She and Emma, together such as they were, were very different in that respect. Nothing about them had ever been easy, but she wanted Emma to be comfortable enough to be herself. Even those few brief weeks in Storybrooke after Henry and Emma had returned from New York City, when she and Emma had worked together, they hadn't always agreed about things. It was the way their relationship worked and Regina didn't want to lose that to whatever this was becoming. Easy was nice, but challenging was something else entirely. It made her blood sing in her veins, her heart beat wildly in her chest. It made Regina feel alive. That was what she wanted, that spark._

_Emma grinned, a little sheepishly. "The food is supposed to be amazing. I'm here with you. What's not to love?"_

_"We'll see," Regina said, laying the menu back down and surveying the room. "I have high standards."_

_Emma laughed. "I noticed. I'm still shocked you set foot in the Bug tonight."_

_Regina sniffed. To be honest, she was a little surprised herself. "Me too." Her lips twisted up in a mischievous grin. "I thought perhaps I would give you a little leeway..."_

_"Enough rope to hang myself," Emma suggested, looking just as amused._

_"Something like that," Regina mused. "Don't make me regret it, dear." The words were light, but there was more truth behind them than Regina wanted to admit. They were both taking a chance, coming here together on a date. Regina still couldn't believe she had accepted Emma's offer. It wasn't that she didn't have feelings for Emma - the other woman made her feel things that she hadn’t contemplated in longer than she wanted to admit, even to herself. But she could have taken the cease fire that Emma offered in their personal war of attrition and let it go at that with no hard feelings. Being Henry's mothers meant it would be best if they got along well enough to make him happy, to not feel torn between the two of them. It didn't mean they had to be anything more than that. If they did begin to date and then broke up, things could become very unpleasant between them again, very quickly. It didn't make sense to jeopardize the fragile peace they had achieved for this faintest, most ridiculous possibility._

_"I think it's worth it, taking that chance," Emma said. "We don't usually spend a lot of time together when someone isn't about to destroy everything that's important to us."_

_"Or trying to destroy each other,” Regina pointed out oh-so-helpfully._

_"Hey, now," Emma said, smiling more than she had any right to when they were discussing the very real times they had fought against one another. Regina had a sudden flash of Emma pressed up against her back, arms pinning her into place and the thin, cold blade of a dagger against her throat. "We haven't tried to kill each other in a year or two."_

_Regina snorted, despite herself, despite her flash of memory. "That's because we didn't see each other for at least one of those years, and avoided each other for most of the second."_

_"Details," Emma said, waving that tiny point away with a flick of her hand. She looked down at the table. "I missed you, you know? When I remembered everything. We got back to Storybrooke and I went to see my parents first, but... I wanted to go see you. I just couldn't figure out how with the way Henry was." She hesitated, one hand splaying out across the table toward Regina but not touching her. "That first night, driving back into Storybrooke, I kept thinking about bringing him back to you that first time. I thought if I brought him back to you then it would be so much worse, with him not remembering you. I couldn't...I didn't know how to do that to you, after everything you had done for us."_

_For a moment, Regina couldn't find any words. It was the last thing she had expected Emma to bring up tonight. She was full of surprises, some less pleasant than others. "It would have hurt more than anything, but being able to see him again, to know that he was alright... It would have been everything, even if he didn't know me."_

_Emma swallowed hard. "Yeah, I get that. It was a cowardly thing to do."_

_"Mmm, perhaps," Regina said. "And selfish. Certainly I wouldn't understand anything about going to extremes to preserve what happiness I had managed to find and hold onto it at all costs." She held her own hand out, laying it a bare inch from Emma's on the table. Emma brushed the side of Regina's index finger with her knuckle. Regina flipped her hand over and twined their fingers together, squeezing until her fingers went white with the pressure._

_"Thank you," Emma said, meeting Regina's gaze and holding it over their joined hands._

_The room quieted, the sudden absence of sound more noticeable than the previous gentle hum of voices, causing both women to look up. "Looks like the first course is here," Emma said, stating the obvious, as waiters began to pour out of the kitchens, bowls in hand. It was an impressive display of coordination, thought Regina. One she would have envied, and recruited the strategist behind it, in her days of fielding an army. Now it raised her estimation of the restaurant and its chef a little bit higher. Sloppy presentation was the mortal enemy of a quality good or service._

_The rich scent of garlic and spices enveloped Regina as their bowls were placed in front of them, chased by the tangy scent of tomatoes and a hint of vinegar. It brought a smile to Regina's face and she reached for her spoon as soon as the waiters stepped away, only distantly hearing Emma thanking the waiters for their food. Flavors exploded on her tongue and Regina had to stifle a groan of pleasure, her hand flying to her mouth to contain it. She bit her lip and was already reaching for another bite when she noticed Emma staring at her own bowl, as if she expected it to jump back at her. "Emma?"_

_"I, um, looked it up, right?" Emma said, glancing up at Regina a second, before turning her attention back to her soup. "Sopón de pescado. I knew it was fish soup, I just didn't realize..." She gestured toward her bowl with both hands, like it should be obvious. Regina followed her glance down, really taking in the sight of it for the first time and laughed. It was prepared in the traditional way, just as it had been in her father's kingdom where she had grown up, with the fish served in the soup, head and tail intact._

_"I promise he's not looking at you, dear," Regina said, with a mischievous smile. "He's long past caring."_

_Emma snorted, despite herself, but looked slightly less green. "Sorry," Emma muttered, her cheeks beginning to flush with embarrassment. "I don't mean to be such a baby about it. It just surprised me." She picked up her spoon with determination._

_"Here," Regina said, holding out the already cooling bite on her own spoon, her other hand cupped protectively beneath it to spare the tablecloth. Her mother had instilled better manners in her than this, but she suddenly wanted Emma's first taste of this to be from her own hand. "Try it and you'll forget about everything except for how wonderful it tastes."_

_Emma leaned forward, glancing down once to not make a fool of herself, but then letting her eyes drift back to Regina's, holding her gaze as she tasted the hearty broth. Her eyes closed as the flavors hit her and she shifted back against her chair. "Oh my god," Emma mumbled through the small mouthful. "That is..." She shook her head. "It's wonderful. Thank you." She picked up her own spoon to take another bite from her own bowl, before she noticed that Regina was still watching her and froze. "What?"_

_Regina shook her head, unable to contain her laughter any longer. "Did you peruse the rest of the menu with equal attention to detail?"_

_Emma's eyes narrowed. "I guess. Why?" She sounded nervous now. Nervous because she was worried about more culinary surprises or because she thought she might have upset Regina? There was no way to tell, but Regina wasn't going to let a perfectly good opportunity to tease The Savior pass her by._

_"Have you noticed the large rectangular table at the center of the room?" Regina asked, tilting her head in its general direction._

_"Of course," Emma said. She gave a mock-shiver. "There's no chairs. I've been around you guys too long. I keep thinking it must be for some creepy ritual sacrifice or something. But I checked. That definitely wasn't on the menu tonight."_

_"No, dear," Regina agreed. "But lechón is. I would imagine they bring it out and present on the table before serving. It's as much a work of art as it is a meal."_

_Emma swallowed, but didn't look surprised this time. "You think?"_

_Regina gave a diffident shrug. "Perhaps."_

_"Well, if it's half as awesome as the soup, I don't care." Emma took another bite to emphasize her point. When she was done, she grinned at Regina. "We should bring Henry here sometime."_

_"Oh?" Regina asked, a little stunned by the sudden shift in topic and the implication that they would be on good enough terms after this to come back here again, together. Not just as friends, or perhaps people who were dating, but with Henry, as a family. Regina wondered if Emma had meant all that or if she was being as oblivious as ever to the meanings of what she had said and done._

_"Yeah, he would think it's the coolest thing ever," Emma said, shooting Regina a conspiratorial grin._

_Regina shook her head. "It was simply dinner, when I was a child." Regina sat down her spoon and gave Emma a penetrating look. "Or something very like it was. Very like all of this." She dabbed her lips with her napkin and put it back in her lap. "But then you knew that. There's no way you could have stumbled over this place. It's over an hour’s drive from Storybrooke and something that happens only on occasion. What were you thinking, Emma Swan?"_

_Emma shrugged, trying to look more confident than nervous and not exactly succeeding. "I thought you might like it?" Emma suggested weakly._

_"You're going to have to do better than that," Regina said. She needed an explanation, not to be coddled and patted on the head. If Emma was toying with her..._

_"Okay," Emma said, putting down her own spoon and holding her hands up in a gesture of surrender. "This might surprise you, but I think a lot about how this world - my world - is connected to yours. Because there's all these fairy tales, right? I mean, I grew up watching the story of you and my mom on a freaking VHS. They didn't exactly get it right, but some of the details... And there are hundreds of other stories like that all around the world. So some of them have to be real. And when you said yes, when you agreed to go out with me, I wanted to do something special, something more than just a regular date."_

_"Anyone can do that?" Regina said, quoting Emma's own words back to her._

_Emma nodded. "Yeah, exactly. So I got to thinking about how certain stories are connected to certain places. They originate there. Some are universal, but others...I thought somehow those stories might be tied to the lands where they originated." She shrugged like it was nothing. "I did some research."_

_"Research?" Regina's heart began to beat faster, and not in the pleasant way that it had earlier. What was Emma implying? Regina might have come close to forgiving Snow White, to tolerating her, but the urge to lash out and destroy anyone or anything that sought to meddle and interfere in her life was still strong._

_"Nothing intrusive," Emma blurted out. "I swear. I didn't want to...I just wanted to do something nice. I asked Henry if I could borrow the book, and when I found the name of the kingdom where you grew up, I asked Kathryn if she knew anything about it. That's it."_

_"And what did Kathryn say when you asked?" Had she mentioned Regina's name or only the kingdom? And how subtle could Emma have possibly been? It wasn't her best quality._

_"She wanted to know why I was asking," Emma admitted. "I told her I'd heard the name when Hook and I went through that portal." Regina scowled at the mere mention of the pirate's name. If she had only gone out the door after Emma, instead of allowing Hook to, all that ridiculousness could have been avoided. She should have listened to her instincts instead of holding herself back in an attempt to give Emma time to calm down. Of all the stupid decisions on her part. When had they ever run from a good argument? Capable of using light magic didn't mean neutered, but Emma was still talking. Regina made herself focus. "...hadn't heard it before and I was curious about it. That was all."_

_Regina bit her lip, trying to think. Perhaps it wasn't so bad._

_"I didn't mention your name," Emma said. "I wouldn't do that to you. I know how much you hate people getting involved in your affairs."_

_"Affairs, dear?" Regina said, raising her eyebrows caustically at Emma. "Aren't you getting a bit ahead of yourself?"_

_Emma choked on nothing, sputtering unattractively and coughing, her hand pressed to her chest to try to suppress it. "Figure of speech," she forced out, between splutters. "I...Regina...I didn't mean..."_

_Taking pity on her, Regina relented and flicked her fingers, waving away what Emma had said. "So you did research," Regina prompted Emma, steepling her fingers and resting her chin against them, her heart still beating more quickly in her chest than she wished to let on._

_"Right, because I wanted to make this special. I know you lived a lot of your life in the Enchanted Forest, but I think that was just a place you lived. I thought, if I could find someplace that was near enough to where you had grown up, maybe this could be like a taste of home?" Emma gave a dismissive little shrug, negating the importance of her words even as she said them._

_Her words took Regina by surprise, bringing with them thoughts of home, the estate she had grown up on and her father. Cora brushed along the edges of those thoughts, looming like a shadow over more pleasant remembrances, always there but never in the way that Regina had yearned for. She pushed those thoughts away with practiced ease and considered the woman before her. Few people would have wondered what her home had been like, much less made a simple gesture meant to remind her of it. Even Henry had never asked what her life had been like as a child, but here Emma was, doing just that, not prying but inviting. It was far more subtle than Regina would ever have given her credit for being. "My grandfather was the king of the realm where I grew up," Regina began, shifting her gaze back to her soup, nudging a morsel of fish with her spoon. It still smelled wonderful, but she was no longer hungry. "He lived in a castle in the midst of the capital city and threw wonderful banquets and fantastic masquerades. We didn't often attend. The king wasn't fond of my mother, even if he did find her useful, and my father...well, he was a fifth son and only valued for his wife and her ability to produce wealth for the royal family." Her lips twisted into a wry grimace. "Of course, I didn't understand all of that as a child, just that we didn't visit much and weren't much respected. It infuriated Mother."_

_"That sucks," Emma said with her usual bluntness. "You were still family. They should have treated you like it."_

_"Family of sorts," Regina said with a diffident shrug. "But royalty is different. Or at least family that involves my mother. Power was more important than love. Loyalty was only important because of what could be gained."_

_"It doesn't sound like a very fun way to grow up," Emma said, with a wrinkle of her nose._

_"It wasn't," Regina agreed, a little bemused. No one had ever put such an importance on fun in her life until Emma had come into it. "Not most of the time." A memory of horses and sun-drenched afternoons crossed her mind. "There were moments though. My father owned a country estate. That's where I spent most of my time growing up. I had tutors and various instructors, of course. Women weren't expected to be educated in those days, but my mother was a firm believer in 'knowledge is power.'"_

_"Of course she was," Emma muttered. Regina pretended not to hear._

_"I had various other tutors and instructors, of course, there to teach me how to be a proper lady. Most of them weren't so bad, though Mother's standards were strict." Her smiled faded a little at the memory of the form some of those reprimands had taken. "But there were others. I always loved my riding lessons. My father would often accompany us. Mother, hardly ever - she preferred carriages. Running across an open pasture, the wind in my face, it was wonderful. When Rocinante would jump..." Regina shook her head with a smile. "There was always that single moment of terror, wondering if we would make it, but then we would be up in the air and it felt like nothing could stop us. We could keep going on forever."_

_"You miss it," Emma noted. "My track record with horses isn't exactly the greatest, but the way you make it sound..." She grinned at Regina. "It might be worth another try."_

_Regina couldn't help her smirk. "Emma Swan on a horse. I'd like to see that."_

_Emma snorted, ignoring their surroundings and the total lack of class she was showing at that moment. "You just want to see me fall on my ass."_

_"Mmm, perhaps," Regina agreed, then drew back enough to look Emma up and down, such as she was able to with them sitting at the table. "But I don't think you would look so bad, astride a horse, properly clad and with a sword in hand. You would cut a very impressive figure."_

_Emma blinked several times and then flushed. "Uh, thanks?" She sounded hoarse and uncomfortable. Knowing that she could get to Emma with a simple compliment, not even that forward, made Regina's smile grow. It was nice to know it worked both ways._

_"You would make a horrible princess," Regina continued, thinking out loud. "At least in that world. I can't imagine you as a proper lady."_

_"Thanks," Emma said again, with a laugh, but this time it was sarcastic and bemused. She ducked her head, hair falling forward to cover her face and admitted, "I think you're probably right."_

_"But," Regina went on, ignoring Emma's interjections. "I think Henry's book was right. You would have made an excellent knight. Brash, headstrong, always ready to charge into danger."_

_"An idiot?" Emma added, leaning back in her chair an arching an eyebrow at Regina. "I know you think I rush into all kinds of stupid things without thinking."_

_"True." Regina couldn't help the way her smile grew. It was setting a bad precedent. "I seem to be finding that less irritating than I used to."_

_"Charming, even?" Emma suggested, mischief dancing in her eyes._

_"Hardly," Regina said firmly. She had no intention of encouraging Emma's rash tendency to leap into danger without a plan or a thought for the consequences of her actions. "And don't let it go to your head, Miss Swan. I don't intend to spend the rest of my life cleaning up after your mistakes."_

_Instead of Emma's face falling, to Regina's surprise, Emma's smiled even brighter, amusement tugging at the corner of her lips. It took Regina a moment to realize why and then it was her turn to redden. "Because you are Henry's other mother and I have come to accept that we will always be connected through him. Nothing more and nothing less."_

_"Of course, Regina," Emma agreed, getting that smile back under control. Regina knew Emma was still savoring her words, accepting them only at face value and deliberately teasing Regina with it. It was mortifying and a little bit infuriating, but the warmth in Emma's eyes said she wasn't mocking, only teasing. That Regina could handle - and give as good as she got. Emma would remember that soon enough, if she hadn't already, and despite it all there was warmth and fondness welling up within her for the woman sitting across from her. They would never be easy, but maybe they could be fun. The last time she had enjoyed herself this much, or been this relaxed with anyone but Henry, had been Robin, and that didn’t bear thinking about._

_***.    ***.     ***_

_Waves surged forward and receded, dragging water, sand and shells back out with them with a gentle hiss. Regina watched as Emma skirted close to them and then darted back away again. From time to time, she wouldn't be fast enough and she would let out a little shriek as the cold water hit her feet. The first time it had happened, Regina hadn't been able to stop the smile that curved over her lips. Then she had stopped trying not to smile. Instead, she watched Emma from further up the beach, safely out of the range of the waves, as she wandered along parallel to Emma's darting, playful progress. Regina's progress was slower. At first it had been because of her heels. Expert at navigating any terrain in them or not, walking in deep sand wasn't pleasant. After a few stiff steps, she had reached down and taken them off. Emma's eyes had been on her the whole time and when she had stood to take off the second shoe, Emma had offered her a hand to steady herself. It wasn't necessary, but Regina had taken it anyway. She had wanted to reach down and take Emma's hand, but having just been handling her shoes, it didn't seem like the most romantic of gestures. She had let go instead and taken a step away, heading down the beach, giving no indication of how wonderful the sand felt against her newly freed toes._

_Emma hadn't seemed to mind, copying Regina by yanking her own shoes off, discarding them in the sand and darting toward the water. She kicked out at the first wave that came near her splashing through the water and jerking back with a yelp as some of the droplets splashed up onto her face and chest. Regina had shook her head and laughed. "You are a child, Miss Swan."_

_"So?" Emma retorted with all the maturity of a second grader. "Come play with me." The tone of her voice when she made the invitation was far from childish. Regina had blinked in surprise at the shiver that had run up her spine at Emma's words. She had been so distracted before Emma had come to pick her up by nerves about their date that and how much of a disaster any relationship between them had the potential to be. She hadn't had a moment to think of the attraction that flared between from time to time. Its raw intensity was like nothing else she had ever experienced. With Daniel it had been different. The attraction was there, of course, she had ached and yearned for him, but she had never wanted to slam him against a wall or be pinned against the nearest piece of furniture. Graham was satisfactory, but perfunctory. Together they had gone through all the appropriate motions and she was always left sated, but something had been missing. His heart, she supposed. Or maybe it would have been like that if it had still beat in his chest. She would never know. Robin had brought the weight of expectations with him. Every gesture had been filled with meaning and history. Attraction had leapt between them, but not burnt with the fury of a thousand suns. She and Emma hadn't even kissed yet, but Regina didn't have a doubt that the tension between them would be explosive if they ever came together. They had spent enough time arguing with one another for Regina to know that, standing so close to one another and pushing and pushing until one of them had to explode into actions or words so that they wouldn't be kissing. It explained more than one of their earlier interactions._

_Emma was trotting back up the beach toward her. "Hey." She smiled goofily at Regina, but slowed beside her to match her ambling pace. "Ready to go back yet? It's starting to get chilly."_

_"Some of us haven't been playing in the surf, Miss Swan," Regina said. "But thank you for asking. I'm fine."_

_"'kay," Emma said. She stared at her hands as if she suddenly didn't know what to do with them. "So I'm just going to..." She gestured behind her at the water, starting to slink away again, but Regina was quicker, catching Emma's hand before she could flee again._

_"Walk with me?" Regina said, glancing over and then away again._

_"Yeah, sure," Emma replied quickly, as if she were worried the offer would be rescinded if she didn't accept it soon enough. Her hand was damp and a little gritty in Regina's, her fingers loose and dangling in Regina's hand, not holding back. It irritated Regina. It had taken enough courage for her to take Emma's hand, to take even the smallest risk to grasp onto what might be happiness, and to have it met not with rejection or enthusiasm, but indifference was infuriating. She and Emma had been many things to one another since they had met, but tepid was not one of them._

_Regina squeezed harder than was purely necessary and Emma winced. "Hey, what was that for?"_

_"If you don't wish to hold my hand, you could have said, Miss Swan," Regina gritted out in return, letting the offending digits go and folding her arm over her chest._

_"I do wish!" Emma countered. "I wish a lot."_

_"No, I insist," Regina said, turning away. "Don't let me force you into doing something you don't wish to. I won't hear the end of it from your parents or the rest of these ridiculous townsfolk."_

_"Regina," Emma said, stumbling around in the sand to get in front of her and managing to kick it up on Regina's feet in the process. She dipped her head to catch Regina's gaze and reached out to take Regina's hand where it rested against her abdomen. Emma held it in both of hers, and keeping her eyes locked on Regina's, she raised Regina's hand to her lips. Regina had been slobbered over enough in her days as the queen to brace herself for it, but Emma's lips were soft, and a little dry, the barest press of warmth against her skin. Still Emma didn't let her hand go. "I want." Even in the faint light from the moon and the distant lighting of the restaurant, Emma's eyes were visible, pupils wide and lost in the darkness._

_Regina held her gaze for a long moment and then slowly pulled her hand away. "Emma, I had an enjoyable evening. Dinner was pleasant and the food was an unexpected delight, but this doesn't have to be anything more. We can return to Storybrooke and go our separate ways with nothing changed from the way that it’s been."_

_The vibrating, playful energy that had been present in Emma since she had suggested a stroll on the beach before they got back in the Bug and headed back to Storybrooke and Regina had accepted, stilled abruptly. "Is that what you want?" Emma asked. Her voice was painstakingly neutral._

_"Don't you think that would be for the best?" Regina asked. "As I said, it's been a good evening, but pushing for more would be a mistake, I think. The odds of us messing this up are nearly the same as those of Grumpy making an ill-timed comment at the next town council meeting and we don't have a good track record of dealing with conflict. It wouldn't be fair to put Henry through that again."_

_"So we don't put Henry through it," Emma said. "We stand here right now and promise that no matter what happens between us, we won't fight in front of or over the kid. We managed to do it for almost a year, despite you being pissed as hell at me."_

_Regina hadn't been, not the whole time, and not as angry as Emma had suspected. She had been hurt and betrayed mostly. With other people, she would have seen it coming and expected the worse, but Emma had never tried to hurt her and she had let her guard down. It was a lesson she would do well to remember here and now. It also wasn't the moment to tell Emma that. "And what about your parents, dear? Did you tell them that I was the reason you needed them to watch Henry for the evening?" Regina changed tact. Emma had to realize what she already had - that there was no way they would ever work out._

_"I told them that you and I were having dinner. I didn't tell them it was a date. Not because I was ashamed or anything, but because I know how much you hate everyone in town knowing about your business and talking about it," Emma added._

_They could do this all evening, Regina realized, point and counterpoint. They had perfected argument to a fine art between them. Instead, Regina asked the question that had been pressing at her all evening, even in the brief periods when she had managed to push it aside enough to enjoy herself. "Do you really think we could have any kind of romantic relationship? One that didn't end in a spectacular disaster in less than a fortnight."_

_"Is that what you've been-" Emma cut herself off. "I, yes, of course, I do."_

_Regina stared at her. "That's it? Just yes."_

_Emma laughed. "No, I mean, I've thought about it a lot, you know? You don't wake up one day, realize this whole amazing life that you had with your kid was a lie, and oh yeah, you're crazy about his other mom, and not spend a lot of time thinking about that."_

_"Is that when you realized?" Regina couldn't help but ask. It had been such a gradual process for her, she hadn't known until it was there. She had no idea how Emma had come to a similar revelation._

_"Yeah, there wasn't much time on the way out of Storybrooke, between freaking out about whether I could handle Henry all by myself and what the hell would happen to Snow and David and all these other people...To you. You know how I grew up. I didn't have a home or a family or anyone to love, until Neal and then Henry. But with Storybrooke, there was this whole town where there was people I cared about. What you did for us, for me, giving us a happy ending, was the most wonderful thing anyone had ever done for me. It broke my heart because you were losing it all at the same time. I couldn't imagine having the strength to do that."_

_Regina sniffed, unable to hold back the remembered pain at knowing she would never be able to see Henry again, never be able to hold him in her arms and know that he was safe and happy. "It wasn't all for you," she admitted._

_"I know that," Emma said, forcing a small smile. "But you did it anyway, for the kid. We'd both do anything for him."_

_"We would," Regina agreed. She hesitated, then looked back up at Emma. "So then, what did you conclude? Why will this work?"_

_"Because we both want it to," Emma said. She fidgeted for a moment, looking as if she wished she had pockets to shove her hands into, and then shook her head. "I want to make you happy. I want to share those moments with you and I want to be there, however you'll let me, for the sad moments and the hard ones and the ones where you want to deck Snow if she makes one more stupid, knowing comment when she has no idea what she's talking about."_

_Regina snorted. "You have no idea." But she didn't continue, leaving Emma space to finish._

_"And, I think, if that's something you want to, we can make this work," Emma said, with a shrug. "I want it to."_

_"We will disagree," Regina pointed out. "About a great many things, both small and fundamental - and we are both very stubborn."_

_"I've noticed," Emma said, nudging her gently with her arm. She grew serious again. "So we do what we've been doing. We talk about it. We find a solution that we can both live with."_

_"And when I hurt you?" Regina asked. She was presuming much for a first date, speaking of this as if it were a relationship. There was no point in pretending though. Any involvement she and Emma would have would never be casual._

_"Who said I won't hurt you first?" Emma said, looking down with a frown._

_"Then I will be angry and hurt and won't speak to you until you come and apologize appropriately," Regina said. She added after a beat. "You will apologize appropriately." She wondered if Emma would understand what she was offering with that sentence, the plea for something she couldn't spell out. She had been hurt too many times. Even now, her heart felt fragile and bruised. She couldn't believe she was holding it out this way again, for it to be smashed anew. Her mother would be appalled - and homicidal._

_Emma burst into a grin, like the brilliance of sunshine after a dark and ferocious storm. "It will be the best apology."_

_"See that it is," Regina said. "And I'll do the same."_

_"Okay," Emma said, her voice barely a whisper and swelling with emotion. Her tongue flicked out to wet her bottom lip. "Can I kiss you?"_

_Regina nodded. She was no passive observer in her own life, but this time she waited, letting Emma do what she would. Emma took a step closer, and Regina thought she might raise a hand to touch her, but she didn't. She tilted her head down, until her lips were almost brushing Regina's, her gaze flicking between Regina's eyes and lips. Emma closed the distance between them slowly and then their lips met. Regina gasped at the instant of connection. Her hand jerked out, reaching for anything to steady herself, and found Emma's hip, fingers curling into a soft curve. Her eyes fell shut as Emma groaned against her lips. For an instant, Regina thought Emma would pull her closer and deepen the kiss, but Emma stepped back and pulled away._

_"Hi," Emma whispered, her breath still warm against Regina's cheek. Her lips had tasted faintly of mint and Regina wondered distantly when she had had time to pop a mint without Regina noticing._

_"Hello," Regina echoed the greeting back to her. Her other hand found its way to Emma's side, fingers curling into the thin fabric of her blouse. "Is this okay?"_

_"Yeah." Emma swallowed, her voice sounding rough. "Shouldn't I be asking you that?"_

_"I'm not so easily breakable, Miss Swan," Regina said, wishing to disabuse Emma of that notion here and now. Her heart was fragile, yes, broken often and stitched back together, but she was not weak and Emma would do well to remember that or this wouldn't work._

_"Okay," Emma said, sounding breathless. "Then can I kiss you again?"_

_Regina laughed. "I appreciate the gesture, dear, but you don't have to ask every time." Regina suited words to actions and stepped closer until the warmth of Emma's body was pressed against hers and she could feel the thud of Emma's heart reverberating against her. She cupped Emma's cheek in her and brushed a thumb over delicate skin, marveling at the way Emma shivered at her touch. "I want, too," Regina said, hoping Emma would understand what she meant, then pressed her lips to Emma's. At first, just a gentle brush of her lips against Emma's and then she deepened the kiss, flicking her tongue against Emma's bottom lip and scraping with just a hint of teeth. Emma groaned again and melted against Regina, her arms going around Regina's waist. Lost in it, Regina let it continue until she felt her thumb brush against the smooth skin the small of Emma's back, bared by the dress’ cutout. Her hand slid in until she had found warm, bare skin. It was too tempting. If she gave in now, she wouldn't stop._

_"Emma," Regina gasped, the word barely comprehensible against Emma's lips. Emma eased away but didn't let go, slipping closer to rest her head against Regina's shoulder and just holding her. "Let's go home."_

_***   ***    ***_

_"Emma," Regina gasped, her voice high and wanton. The car’s center console pressed against one thigh and chill air ran up the other in sharp contrast to the burning heat of Emma’s hand. Her fingers trailed from the back of her ankle to mid-thigh and back down again without stopping. Her lips traced a path from Regina's jaw to the base of her throat, stopping only to lave a sensitive spot that had made Regina shiver a moment before - but then Regina hadn't wanted her to stop. Sometime earlier she had slipped one strap of Emma’s dress off her shoulder and palmed her breast over the matte fabric of her bra. Emma's nipple stood proud and erect beneath the thin fabric. Regina brushed over it with her thumb, alternating pressure and direction, in lazy circles meant to drive Emma mad. When Regina couldn't stand it any longer, she pushed up, exposing her Emma's breast and bent to brush her lips over it, her tongue flicking out to taste and tease._

_Emma whimpered and her hand fisted in Regina's hair, holding her in place. Regina responded enthusiastically, taking Emma's other breast in her hand and giving it a similar treatment. It wouldn't do to neglect it. The hand on her leg moved higher and palmed her ass, pulling her closer. Regina pushed against the floorboard with her toes, trying to help. She wanted to be closer, feel more of Emma, skin against skin. She was almost in Emma's lap when something jabbed into her thigh and the steering wheel hit her side. Regina hissed and flopped back into her own seat with a distinct lack of grace. "Damn it." She huffed and blew hair out of her face._

_"Don't worry 'bout it," Emma said, looking dazed. She undid her own seatbelt and performed some miracle of contortion until she was straddling Regina's lap in this passenger seat. "I got this." Her hips shifted, pressing against Regina's and dragging Regina's skirt up another few inches in process. Regina's hands dropped to Emma's sides to steady her, and she took a moment just to look at Emma. Already she looked thoroughly disheveled. Her hair was a mess, blonde strands flying this way and that, while her shirt gaped obscenely open. At the sight of her exposed chest, Regina ran her fingers from the base of her throat to just between her breasts. She could feel the way Emma had stopped breathing at the faint contact and savored the little thrill of power it gave her. Regina let her hand rest over Emma's heart and leaned up to capture Emma's lips again. She couldn't get enough; she wanted more and more. Emma was quickly becoming a dangerous addiction. Emma's hips rocked forward again and Regina could feel the warmth of her center. Her hand leapt to the small of Emma's back and held her there._

_"Regina," Emma gasped, throwing her head back. "Please. Can we... touch me?"_

_The words hit Regina like an icy shower in the midst of a blazing hot August day. "Darling." If she moved her hand she could just...and then unzip Emma's jeans enough to slip her hand inside or magic them off completely. But..."Emma. We have to stop."_

_"Stop," Emma echoed, still lost in desire. Then Regina's words caught up with her desire-fogged brain. "Stop?" Emma sat back and forced her hands to stop moving. "Right. Sorry."_

_"You have nothing to be sorry for," Regina said, cupping Emma's cheek in her hand, not letting Emma look away. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let it get this far, but our first time will not be in the front seat of this ridiculous car. I refuse to allow it."_

_"Okay." Emma said. She sounded relieved, and Regina wondered just what she had been expecting._

_"I'm going to go inside, go to bed and toss and turn restlessly until tomorrow morning," Regina said, forcing the words out, despite being able to imagine what she would much rather be doing in vivid detail. "And then, you're going to call me and you and Henry will come over for breakfast. If you still feel the same way that you do this evening. Does that sound acceptable?"_

_Emma wrinkled her nose and sat back, her hands resting on Regina's shoulders for balance. "I can think of better ways to spend the night, but if that's what you need, that's what we'll do."_

_"What about you, Emma?" Regina whispered, unable to help herself. "What do you need?"_

_At that Emma tilted her head up beseechingly, biting her lip. "One more kiss to hold me over until the morning?"_

_Regina chucked in pure delight. "One more kiss," she agreed, tilting her lips to kiss Emma, long, slow and thorough. If they were going to walk away from one another, she wanted Emma to remember every detail of this moment, to ache and yearn alone in her bed, the way that Regina surely would._

_It was several long moments later before Emma walked her to her door._

__


	7. iv.

Emma's hand was shaking and her palm sweaty. Regina held her hand anyway. She didn't think she could let go even if she had wanted. They were being announced, by Leroy of all people. He seemed to do all the announcing in this town. "Mrs. Regina Swan-Mills and Mrs. Emma Swan-Mills."

 

There were people on both sides of the aisle throwing birdseed - and Regina had firmly instructed Snow that this would not be done. She refused to feed Snow's little woodland friends as part of her wedding ceremony. In a way, it was only fitting that Snow hadn't listened. Some things never changed. Regina squeezed Emma's hand harder, hard enough that Emma looked away from all the cheers and congratulations, and Ruby swooping in to hug her, while David clapped her on the back. Archie and Kathryn were both dancing around Regina doing the same, but it was clear she wasn't paying attention to them. In the general din of good cheer and shouted congratulations, they didn't seem to mind. There was something about the set of her mouth and the distant look in her eye that worried Emma. 

 

"Hey," Emma said, stepping back to put some space between her and Ruby. "I think I need a minute to catch my breath, guys. We'll be right back." With that, she tugged once on Regina's hand and then started pushing her way through the crowd until they were free of milling, touching, crowding people. Emma pulled them into a side room down the hall, pausing just long enough to check that it was empty, before she shut the door behind them and locked it. She let go of Regina's hand as soon as they were inside the room, stepping back until she was pressed up against the door. "Hey," Emma said again. She looked serious and a little worried, her eyes dark as she watched Regina. "That got a little crazy in there."

 

"Yes." Regina agreed on autopilot.

 

"I can go if you want," Emma said, jerking her thumb over her shoulder toward the door. "I just thought it would be easier to get you out of there without anyone saying anything if we both bailed."

 

Like the others, Regina heard her words, they flowed through her mind and out the other side. Emma was babbling because she was nervous. Some things never changed. But she wasn't pushing. If anything, Emma was doing the opposite of pushing. Regina stepped forward, taking one hand to tilt Emma's chin down. "How's your head? Perhaps we should have waited after all, if you aren’t feeling well."

 

"No, it’s fine." Emma shrugged. "A little sore." Her shoulders slumped, but she said nothing about how tired she must be. That was Emma, Regina marveled. So very stubborn. "Regina?" Emma called softly.

 

"Hmm?" It occurred to Regina to wonder how long she had been standing there staring at the small bandage that had been artfully disguised in Emma's hair. It had precluded an elaborate hairstyle, but it was still small enough that no one would notice in the photos.

 

"Are you okay?" Emma asked.

 

"I'm married, dear." Regina said.

 

"Yeah," Emma agreed. "We both are." She pressed her hands back against the door, but otherwise didn't move. "Do you want a divorce?" She wasn't nervous or joking, but matter-of-fact.

 

"We just got married. I think that would be a bit sudden. Henry would be devastated," Regina noted.

 

"No, he wouldn't," Emma said. "He would understand. And so would I. I don't ever want you to feel trapped with me."

 

"I bought you the ring, dear," Regina reminded her. "I asked you."

 

"Okay," Emma said. "But that doesn't mean you can't change your mind - or that there isn't a difference between buying a ring and actually being married again."

 

"There is," Regina agreed, and there had been a moment out there that had felt wrong. A crowd of people cheering and happy, Regina lost in it while her heart raced in her chest, nameless, faceless, nothing but the bride. The difference had come with Emma noticing, Emma pulling her away to give her a quiet moment to recover. Leopold had never noticed, never cared, never given her a choice. It was just one of the things that made a difference. "What about you?" Regina asked.

 

"Terrified," Emma said with a laugh. "I know I shouldn't be. Nothing's really changed, right? We'll still go home together tonight, just like we have for years, but..."

 

"But hearing it declared before all the people that we know and love and declaring that it's permanent is different," Regina supplied.

 

"And it's not that I'm having cold feet," Emma jumped back in quickly. "It's just...huge. You know I don't do huge well."

 

Regina smiled. "You do it better than you think, dear." She let her thumb trail down the line of Emma's jaw and then fall to her shoulder. She laid her head on Emma's shoulder and let herself sag against Emma, her other hand clutching at Emma's waist. "Thank you," Regina said into the quiet.

 

Emma's hands dropped to her hips, waiting to see if Regina was okay before she slipped her arms around her waist. Regina blinked, holding back tears, not of sorrow but of relief. Pure, sweet relief that they had both made it, survived and they were here together. She held Emma a little more tightly. "How long do you think we can stay here before they come looking for us?" Regina murmured into Emma's shoulder.

 

"Don't care," Emma said, just as matter-of-factly as she had before. "We don't have to let any of 'em in."

 

"Except Henry," Regina amended. Always Henry.

 

"Okay, Henry can come in," Emma agreed. "But the rest of them can just wait. This is our day."

 

Regina snorted, pulling back a little to stand straighter. Her back was starting to twinge. She was aging and she didn't particularly like it. "Tell that to your mother."

 

"God, don't remind me," Emma whined. "She had gotten so much better."

 

"Perhaps we should have eloped," Regina suggested, a smile twitching at the corners of her mouth. It was a nice thought, but not one she would have ever suggested in truth. She knew how much having family there mattered to Emma.

 

"Henry," Emma said, with a little frown. "But if we'd brought him then Snow would have been pissed." She wrinkled her nose. "So I guess it's better we did it this way after all."

 

"If you say so, dear," Regina said, but it was without any real dissension. A thought occurred to her, one that hadn't yet that evening. "I am happy to be married to you."

 

"Oh yeah?" Emma's smile was like the sun bursting through the clouds.

 

"Yes," Regina said firmly, reaching up to stroke her hand down Emma's cheek. She wanted to... Emma had put her foot down when they were discussing the ceremony and despite Snow's protestations, Granny's insistence that that was the way it was always done and even Henry's surprise, had insisted that there would be no kiss between the two brides. Nothing could persuade her otherwise, and it seemed like Regina was the only one who hadn't tried to convince her that it was necessary. It was the spectacle, Emma had told her. She didn’t want everyone gawking at “the Savior and the Evil Queen,” making it tawdry. But now Regina found herself very much wanting to kiss Emma. "May I kiss you?"

 

"Um, yes," Emma said, with a very definitive nod that made Regina laugh and shake her head at Emma's antics. She was still smiling when she pressed her lips to Emma's. It began with the barest brush of lips and then deepened. The taste and feel of Emma was as intoxicating as it had always been. She kissed Emma until it was enough, until the yearning ache in her heart was eased. Emma was here. She wasn't going anywhere and she was safe in Emma's arms.

 

"I suppose we should rejoin the others," Regina said, a moment after she had pulled away.

 

"Do we have to?" Emma groaned. "I like this. This is nice."

 

"It is very nice," Regina agreed. "But I believe you promised me dancing, Miss Swan."

 

Emma's head snapped up so quickly that she almost hit Regina. She was grinning broadly. "That's Mrs. Swan-Mills to you, Madame Mayor."

 

And Regina laughed.

 

***    ***    ***

 

David was an excellent dancer. It shouldn’t have surprised Emma. Her dad was Prince Freaking Charming, after all. Being an awesome dancer was practically part of the job description. But it had, and she was left hanging on for dear life as he twirled them both around the rented ballroom, managing to make even her look graceful.

 

“Okay. Okay, David,” Emma repeated, squeezing harder on his shoulder. “Less twirling.” They were the only words she could force past her lips as she focused on pushing down the nauseous feeling that had only grown with every whirl around the dance floor. Her head was still tender and felt odd. Dancing with David was fine, but Emma was tired. What she wanted most of all was to be back in Regina’s arms, safe and calm with absolutely no twirling.

 

“Sorry,” he said with a grin, sweeping them into one last sharp turn that killed their momentum, and eased them out of the main path on the dance floor. “I got carried away.”

 

David almost always seemed happy, with a broad smile at the ready and eagerness to undertake whatever befell him. It was easy to see why Snow had called him her “Charming”. This evening, though he seemed even more cheerful and energetic than usual. It stood in contrast to Snow who was being overly emotional about everything, weeping at the slightest provocation and trying to infuse even the small things with the most profound meaning. It was a wonder there hadn’t been a homicide yet.

 

“That’s okay,” Emma said. “My head’s pretty hard, but I don’t think my stomach got the memo yet.”

 

“I’ll keep that in mind,” David said with a grin, dropping out of the formal dancing form with his head held high to look down at her. He didn’t say anything and Emma started to feel uncomfortable under his gaze. The urge to shift and squirm was growing rapidly.

 

“David…” she whined. “Just spit it out.” She couldn’t take any more of those long emotional looks, the yearning and the deep puppy dog eyes. Snow had that covered for everyone.

 

In response, David straightened, falling back into formal prince mode, and lifted his head again. He guided them back out into the main crush of dancers but at a slower pace this time. His eyes focused on some point just over her shoulder, he spoke. “When your mother found out she was pregnant with you, there were so many things I dreamed about doing with you. So many firsts that we would have as a family. Your first smile. The first time you crawled and walked. The first time I took you riding or gave you a sword when you were far too young and Snow was furious. When we knew that the curse was coming and the plan was to send you away with Snow before you were born, I thought I would never get to see you, much less have any of those moments with you. And here we are, dancing together at your wedding.” He shrugged. His choked voice and the tears welling in his eyes giving away the feelings all that cheerful energy had attempted to mask.

 

Emma stopped short, taking a deep breath and closing her eyes before she shifted them toward the center of the dance floor and out of the way of the oncoming dancers. She didn’t say anything just stepped forward and slipped her arms around him, laying her head on his shoulder. Discovering her parents at the age of 28 - and finding out that they were technically younger than she was - had led to some very odd moments. It was a dissonance that Emma preferred to ignore, for the most part. David and Mary Margaret had felt like family almost from the beginning, even before she had discovered who they were. It was less often that they felt like her parents. David, more so than Mary Margaret, who was always there with motherly concern and ready advice. This moment, though, felt like all the times Emma had wished for a Dad to do cool things with, to have her back, to do all the things with her that cool TV sitcom dads had done with their children and she had only been able to imagine. “Thanks,” Emma whispered into his chest, unwilling to look up at him or explain further.

 

David responded by wrapping his arms around her and squeezing her back in a fierce hug that left her breathless. It was too tight and it didn’t help the way her head was pounding, but Emma loved every second of it.

 

***    ***    ***

 

Emma leaned back against the wall and crossed her arms over her chest. A poof of air escaped as the gesture pushed down on the fabric of her dress. It wasn’t the monstrosity that she had feared when Snow had first started going on about how gorgeous her wedding dress would be and how she simply had to go with traditional. Emma, suspecting that traditional meant both gigantic and poofy, full of ruffles and frills, had retaliated by threatening to wear her favorite pair of skinny jeans and red leather jacket. It had almost worked until Regina had heard her threat. It was always worrisome when Mary Margaret and Regina agreed on something. In the end, the dress hadn’t been so bad. It was sleek, with clean lines and intricate detailing. Despite her best efforts, it made Emma feel like a princess, and all of it paled in front of the way Regina made her feel, wonderfully cherished and loved. Maybe a little bit like an idiot for getting knocked unconscious on her wedding day. If she wasn’t likely to black out from the pain, she would have banged her head against the wall for ruining this day for Regina.

 

They were married now though, something Emma had never thought they would have after Regina had turned her down. In a way it felt no different than the way they had been living before. They were a family with bonds that couldn’t be strengthened or broken by any piece of paper or legal declaration. Then, Emma would stop and think about it, really think about what they had promised and it would seem big, so huge that it was daunting. Yet she wanted it still. The only running she would be doing this time would be toward it.

 

“Deep thoughts, Mom?” Henry questioned, sliding into place next to her against the wall and nudging her shoulder with his own.

 

“Hey, kid,” Emma said, lighting up at the sight of her son. Her thoughts and the exhaustion of the day had begun to weigh on her and he was just what she needed for a little pick me up. “Not so much. Just thinking about how crazy this day is.”

 

“Pretty crazy,” Henry agreed, slouching a little so they were about eye level. “I think Grams has had too much to drink.”

 

“Oh, God,” Emma groaned. “Please tell me you’re joking.”

 

Henry snorted and just shook his head. “I think Gramps is on it. It’s pretty funny though.”

 

“Not if she corners Regina and starts slurring at her, it won’t be,” Emma muttered. “My head hurts too much for this.”

 

“Mom?” Henry demanded, shooting off the wall and into a standing position.

 

Emma waved a dismissive hand at him. “It’s fine. Fine,” Emma repeated at his skeptical look. She held his gaze until he glanced down and started to raise the bottle of beer, label damp and peeling, to his lips. Emma snagged it mid-way and took a long pull on it before she held it back out to him. “Nothing a little drink won’t cure.”

 

“Yup,” Henry said, with a nod, slouching back against the wall once more. “It goes great with a head injury.”

 

“One little slug won’t-” Emma began.

 

“Tell that to Mom when you pass out again,” Henry cut her off, showing off his ruthless streak. It was his turn to cross his arms over his chest again. “I’m sure it won’t freak her out at all.”

 

“Hmph. You play dirty, Henry Mills,” Emma said with a scowl. This time when she reached over it was to tousle his hair.

 

“Hey!” He yelped, raising his arms protectively. “Not the hair! Anything but the hair. I have a girlfriend, Emma.”

 

“Aren’t you cute?” Emma drawled, earning a scowl from Henry this time. “But if you spill that beer on this dress, kid, it won’t be me you have to answer to.”

 

“No,” he said, but he was grinning again. “It won’t be.” He glanced back down at the bottle in his hand. “So, hey, you’re gonna be a Mills now too.”

 

Emma shrugged as if it weren’t a huge deal. “Swan-Mills.”

 

“Yeah,” Henry said. “Mom too.” He glanced over at her slyly, out of the corner of his eye. “Maybe I should change my name too.”

 

“Kid…” Emma said, and then trailed off out of words. She ducked her head and slipped one arm behind his back, pulling him to her for an awkward side hug. Then, deciding it wasn’t good enough, Emma tugged him closer until he had both of his arms wrapped around her too. Her chin dug into his shoulder. It wasn’t the other way around anymore. Her baby was all grown up. “Talk to your mom about it, kid,” Emma said. “But I would love it.”

 

“Yeah?” Henry asked, sounding young and hesitant.

 

“Oh, yeah,” Emma whispered, pulling him as tight as she could. She didn’t let go until they heard a loud protest from somewhere across the ballroom. Both of their heads shot up and Emma stepped forward, acting on instinct to put Henry behind her and out of harm’s way.

“What was that?” Emma asked, not seeing anything as she scanned the crowd. If someone with an axe to grind had come to settle an old score with Regina today of all days...but what worried Emma more was that she couldn’t find Regina in the crowd. Not yet.

 

“There she is,” Henry said. “Near the banquet table.”

 

“Right,” Emma said, relief flooding her as she found Regina. “She’s…” the ‘fine’ that had been about to tumble out of Emma’s mouth, was cut off by her hand clapping her mouth shut. “Oh, no.”

 

“Oh, no is right,” Henry agreed. “I’ve never seen Grams that drunk,” he added as the woman in question tried to take another step toward Regina, but stumbled instead. She would have fallen, except she managed to get an arm around Regina’s neck at the last moment and ended up draped all over Regina. Snow hung from her like a limpet, as Emma’s horror grew with every passing instant.

 

“Go give her an assist,” Emma said, thumping Henry’s shoulder lightly with the back of her hand. He would be able to make his way through the crowd faster than she could right now. The jolt of adrenaline that shot through her body at the disturbance had shot her blood pressure up and left her feeling lightheaded. The last thing she needed was to distract from the commotion Snow was causing by fainting as she tried to hurry over there. It was so very un-Sheriff-y.

 

"...so happy!" Snow's slurring words drifted over to her, managing to penetrate the crowd noise now and then. "...a family again...always meant to be...my favorite daughter-in-law..."

 

"Oh, shit," Emma breathed the word out, astounded that even drunk Snow could think this was a good idea. About to faint or not, Emma started shoving her way through the crowd, making her way over to Regina, Snow and Henry as fast as she could. She was almost there when Henry finally made it, slipping between Regina and Snow and coming up under Snow’s arm, deftly sliding it off Regina’s shoulder and freeing her at the same time.

 

“Hey, Grams,” Henry said cheerfully. His full attention seemed focused on the woman now leaning heavily on him, but Emma knew better. He was paying just as close, if not more attention to his mother. Regina had stepped gracefully away the moment Henry had taken Snow’s weight, as if it was a move they had choreographed. Emma knew it wasn’t, but it was a thing of beauty to watch Henry and Regina work together. They had years of playing off each other to know how the other would respond and react accordingly.

 

“Henry!” Snow was just as delighted to see Henry as she had been to see Regina a few moments before. “Isn’t this the best day? It’s just wonderful. I never thought I’d get to see your mom look this happy…” She trailed off, her eyes glazing over before she snapped them back into focus. “And Emma! Doesn’t she look so beautiful, Henry? Like a real princess,” she cooed dreamily. “It’s everything I ever wanted for both of them.”

 

An unexpected pang struck Emma’s heart at Snow’s words. They were ridiculous, of course. One stupid dress wouldn’t make her any more or less of a princess - or erase any of the shitty foster homes and years of loneliness she’d had - the same way that one wedding couldn’t erase years of wrongs, miseries and abuse that had been done to Regina. It was foolish for Snow to even think it, but so very like Snow. Sweet in her own way, completely thoughtless and insensitive, and a desperate attempt to ignore everything that had come before to focus on the positive. That, at least, was one thing Emma was grateful Henry hadn’t inherited from his grandmother. He might be the truest believer, but it was tempered by memory and knowledge. Forgetting, pretending something had never happened wasn’t the answer. Only by acknowledging and remembering could they ever move forward.

 

Henry was still smiling at his grandmother, but it didn’t reach his eyes. It was his politician’s expression - one he’d picked up from Regina. Emma didn’t think anyone else had recognized it for what it was yet. They were all so used to thinking of Henry as the truest of them all. It made him even better when he did try to slip something past people. Emma couldn’t have been prouder. “I think Gramps was looking for you earlier. Have you seen him?”

 

“No, not since…” Snow trailed off again, her brow furrowing as she was lost in deep thought. “Not since...I can’t remember.” She looked startled. “I have to find him,” she added, urgency filling her voice as if he had been lost to a squad of King George’s men, not a ballroom filled with revelers. “Will you help me find him, Henry? I always find him.”

 

“Of course, Grams,” Henry said, tightening his grip around her torso, just below her shoulders. “Let’s start over here by the tables. Maybe he stopped to get something to eat.”

 

“Thanks, kid,” Emma muttered beneath her breath, as Henry guided Snow past her. She kept her voice low so Snow wouldn’t hear. The last thing she wanted to be right now was noticed. Snow would stop and make another big scene and Emma might lose her temper if Snow kept on in the same vein she had been. It was best for everyone Henry just kept hustling Snow back over to Charming who would hopefully drag her home to sleep it off, with a delightful hangover ready for her the next morning. Then, in a week or so, when Regina and Snow saw one another again, they could have a delightful conversation where Snow flushed, and stammered and tried her best to apologize and Regina needled her with biting, all-too-true comments. It would make both of them happy.

 

“You owe me one,” Henry shot back, just as quietly. Emma broke her own rule to slap him on the back. She had the sudden urge to pull him into a hug, but pushed it back for the same reason she hadn’t spoken louder. He had turned out better than she had ever imagined, her kid.

 

“Love you,” Emma said, forcing the words out past the lump in her throat. She thought Henry hadn’t heard her over the din of the crowd, but then his head snapped around and he flashed her the most brilliant grin.

 

“You too,” he mouthed back and then turned back before Snow could notice anything had happened and continued guiding her through the crowd.

 

A faint touch at the small of her back almost made Emma jump. It shouldn’t have surprised her though. She knew Regina had been lurking in the crowd, but had lost track of her sometime in the effort to get Snow diverted to anywhere that was away from them.

 

“Feeling sentimental tonight, Miss Swan?” Regina purred. She was so close Emma could feel the warmth of her breath brushing lightly against her ear. A shiver ran down Emma’s spine. How the hell could she have been so stupid to get a concussion on today of all days?

 

“I guess I am,” Emma admitted, turning so she was facing Regina. “It’s all Henry’s fault. The kid’s been trying to wreck me since the ceremony was over. Do you think he and Evie have a bet going about who’s going to cry first?”

 

“No, not Evelyn,” Regina said, as she considered it. “But I wouldn’t put it past the other Charming heir to be involved. He has your sense of humor.”

 

Emma groaned. “They shouldn’t have let him spend so much time with me when he was a baby.”

 

Regina shrugged one shoulder, making it look classy and elegant, the opposite of Emma’s usual artless gesture. “Free babysitting is hard to turn down.”

 

Emma snorted. “Gee, thanks.”

 

“It wasn’t meant as a slight, dear. Despite your inexperience with children, you are good with them,” Regina said. The way she was smiling at Emma, bright and big, but tempered by how much it all was, was far more than the moment called for. It seemed Regina couldn’t stop thinking about what all this meant either. It had taken time for Emma to realize how deeply Regina felt everything, but when she had, it had become one of the things she loved most about her.

 

Emma bit her lip in a vain attempt to hold back her own growing smile as she looked into Regina’s eyes. “Yeah, well, we all know why that is.”

 

“Oh?” Regina said coyly as if she had no idea what Emma was talking about.

 

Emma slipped her arms around Regina’s waist and stepped closer to her. “Yeah,” Emma murmured. “Somebody gave me all her memories of raising our son that one time we got cursed by some little shit of an ancient teenager.”

 

“I would prefer it if you didn’t mention one of the worst years of my life on what is supposed to be a happy day,” Regina said, but she was leaning into Emma as she did, her arms coming up to hold Emma as well.

 

“Yeah, right, sorry,” Emma murmured. “Won’t happen again.” Despite her best efforts, her eyes were beginning to drift shut.

 

Regina’s hand moved and Emma felt a sharp pinch at her side. “Wake up, darling. It’s not time for sleep yet.”

 

Emma grinned and did her best to focus again. It was getting harder and harder as exhaustion slipped over her. “You going to keep me up all night?”

 

“Would that I could,” Regina said, sounding wistful. Her hand came up to brush over Emma’s cheek. “Whale is insisting that I wake you every few hours to check on you.”

 

Emma groaned. “Yeah, I know the drill.”

 

“I thought you might,” Regina said. “If only it were for a more pleasant reason.”

 

“Now I know what to get you for our first anniversary,” Emma murmured. “Do you mind?” she asked, ducking her head toward Regina’s shoulder. Regina shook her head and Emma laid her aching head down. Regina swayed them both back and forth, somehow managing to remain in time with the music that drifted through the ballroom. Fortunately it was a slow waltz.

 

“If you think it will take us a year to have a night like that again, you’re more badly concussed than I thought,” Regina said. There was a faint brush of lips against her neck. Emma felt the small gesture all the way down to her toes. It might also have something to do with Regina’s voice purring in her ear.

 

“It’s never too early to plan ahead,” Emma said. “But I sure wouldn’t turn it down.”

 

“I thought not,” Regina said dryly. “How’s your head?”

 

“S’ okay,” Emma said, too relaxed now to straighten up or force her words out without slurring. “Better now.”

 

“How charming,” Regina muttered and then sighed. “You had better not drool on me, dear.”

 

Emma’s head snapped up quickly enough that she winced. “I wouldn’t dare.”

 

“Oh yes,” Regina countered. “You would.” The slight pressure she put between Emma’s shoulders, urging her back down meant she did mind as much as she was pretending to. “Your family must always push it too far.”

 

Emma resisted Regina’s hand on her back to hold her gaze. “I’m sorry about Snow. She had no right-”

 

“No, she did not,” Regina said with a sigh. “But if I have gotten used to nothing else, it is the way that Snow runs roughshod over my wishes to express her happiness at my happiness. At least this time it was real happiness and not a figment of her imagination.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Emma repeated.

 

“Why?” Regina asked, drawing back to look at her. “You are not responsible for Snow’s actions.”

 

“Yeah, well, I kind of ruined your life there for a while, what with the kid and-” Regina put a finger over her lips, cutting Emma off.

 

“Are we back to that again?” Regina asked.

 

Emma stood and shrugged. “I guess so. I did kind of rip away your soulmate by bringing his wife back from the past.”

 

"If you think I haven't forgiven you for that by now..." Regina said, with a frown and a furrowed brow.

 

Emma shrugged. "We never talk about it."

 

"No, I suppose we don't. But you thought tonight would be a good moment to bring it up?" Regina said, pointedly looking around at the grand ballroom.

 

"Head injury," Emma reminded her, started to tap her head and decided against it. She went for the universal sign for crazy at the last moment.

 

"I think you're taking advantage of that,” Regina said, her eyes narrowing as she studied Emma from head to toe. “Hours ago you insisted you were just fine - not a thing wrong with you. It’s quite the different tune now.”

 

"Maybe." Emma said. “Maybe not.”

 

Regina sighed and gave in to the discussion Emma was insisting they have. "Fine. Perhaps Robin could have been my soulmate at the point in my life when Tinker Bell used her fairy dust. Perhaps he still could have been when he came to Storybrooke, but soulmate or not you are who I found and what I want. I chose to be with you and I choose it again and again every day. I chose it today when we stood before our families and made promises to one another. In my life, it was rare that I ever had a choice about anything, and it means so much to me to have a choice in this. I have no regrets, Emma."

 

Emma swallowed hard, relief and regret mixing into something painful and wonderful. "I want you to be happy."

 

Regina stroked Emma's face, brushing across her cheekbone and tracing the line of her jaw. Emma melted into her touch and her eyes fell shut. Soft lips brushed hers and Emma whimpered at the tenderness of it. They were gone again just as quickly as they had come. Emma's eyes snapped open at the loss, leaning after her until she got herself under control and snapped back up straight.

 

"That’s not your decision, dear," Regina said. “But I appreciate the thought.” Regina held her silence for a moment, looking away from Emma and taking in the ballroom full of people, laughing, dancing and toasting to the celebration of their marriage. “I am, dear. I am so very happy with you and our son.”

 


	8. i.

_The raspy scrape of Emma's shovel on the sidewalk was loud in the stillness of the early morning air. Mifflin Street was quiet, even by the standards of residential Storybrooke, but the rhythmic thunk and scrape of Emma's shovel as she cleared Regina's walk was somehow soothing. The cadence of it seeped into her bones, and instead of the snow growing heavier with each shovelful, it seemed to get lighter. Her arms felt strong and her heart light. Maybe today would be the day. Before long, Emma was nearing the steps and wide semi-circle porch. Dawn was almost there and soon it would be time to leave before Regina woke. Henry was still asleep back at the apartment this morning, not up in his bedroom overlooking the front lawn. There would be plenty of time to get back and fix him breakfast before he woke up._

_A bead of sweat clung to the tip of Emma's nose and she swiped at it with the back of her hand, before she jogged back to her car. It was parked well down the street from 108 Miflin and it wasn't for lack of free parking spaces. Making an effort to be quiet, Emma stowed her snow shovel and reached in for the well-protected vase. It was small and delicate but Emma hoped it was staying warm enough now that they wouldn't freeze before Regina came out to get the paper._

_The several month long winter that they'd been having in the middle of a fine Maine summer was gone now thanks to reaching an agreement with Elsa. She really wasn't such a bad kid, when she wasn't, you know, with the ice and the frozen hearts. In a few more days, there wouldn't even be a need to shovel Regina's walk anymore, Emma thought as she jogged back up the path and took the steps in one leap. Her boot skidded on the slick porch and Emma's arms pinwheeled wildly before she managed to catch herself. Breathing out a sigh of relief, Emma shrugged her jacket back up on her shoulders and took two long strides to the door. She bent to place the small vase, containing four crocus flowers - each a burst of brilliant yellow in the midst of deep purple petals - on the doormat. Not too close, where Regina would knock them over, but far enough away that she would see them as soon as she opened it. Emma reached over to snag it from where the delivery kid's lazy throw had sent it and placed it neatly next to the vase. There was no excuse for laziness. Maybe now that things had seemed to thaw, both literally and figuratively between Robin, Marian and Regina during the final conflict with Elsa, Regina might be ready to consider forgiving Emma for what she had done. Maybe._

_Emma was just about to stand up when the door creaked. It was a useless gesture, but Emma froze in place anyway. She was standing squarely in front of the door that Regina had just opened. There was no way that Regina could miss her._

_"Miss Swan." Regina's voice had more of a cold bite than the winter air. "What are you doing on my porch at this hour of the morning?"_

_Emma braced herself and straightened. "Oh, hey, Regina, I was just..." She made a gesture over her shoulder with her thumb._

_"Yes, but why are you here at all?" Regina demanded. Worry flooded her features as she pulled her robe a little bit tighter and took a half-step out onto the porch. "Is Henry-"_

_"No!" Emma said, cutting Regina off before she could even finish that thought. "No, no. The kid is fine. He's still asleep back at the apartment. I'm gonna fix him a big breakfast, omelettes, waffles, bacon, the works, just as soon as I get home."_

_"So I ask again, why are you here and not at your own home, caring for our son?" The porch must have been freezing beneath Regina's slippered feet, because she took a step back into the warmth of the house. That must be the reason. She wouldn't back away from Emma for anything else._

_"I just, well I," Emma stuttered and bent over to retrieve the small vase from the doormat and held it out to Regina. "I brought these." Regina didn't take them from her and Emma was conscious of how awkward she looked and felt holding them out with no one to take them. She didn't want to lower her hand, but Regina wasn't going to take them. "They're for you," Emma added. "Crocuses - one of the first signs of spring. Sometimes they even come up through the snow. I thought you might like them." Emma shrugged and gave in, lowering the vase back to her side. "I thought they might bring some cheerfulness to your day."_

_"Yes, dear, because I'm the first person one thinks of when one thinks of joy and cheer," Regina said. "How appropriate. You give gifts with as much skill and forethought as you do everything else."_

_"They were supposed to be part of my apology," Emma muttered, clenching her teeth and trying not to lose her temper. She had been doing little - and not so little things like this - for Regina for months now. Each time, every gesture had been rejected out of hand and without consideration. At first, Emma had understood it. She and Regina had always communicated best through argument and conflict, but this time Emma wasn't fighting back. Regina didn’t even seem to notice. It had hurt more than Emma had expected, but she knew she deserved it for being responsible for ruining Regina's life again - even if it was unintentional. It always was with Regina and somehow that made it worse. Emma was determined to stick it out though. As much as it went against her grain, she would do whatever it took to make this up to Regina, to apologize for ruining the happiness that Regina had found with Robin._

_Regina stared at Emma, her face a blank mask. "What apology?"_

_"You know, for me bringing Marian back, for messing things up for you with Robin," Emma said, her cheeks growing hot with embarrassment. Regina didn't even know she was trying to make amends. How could she not get it?_

_Regina gripped the doorframe so hard that Emma was honestly surprised that the wood didn't split beneath her fingers. "Miss Swan," Regina said, drawing herself up. "You need to leave and you need to stop this." Regina stepped back, about to sweep the door closed in front of her, without her flowers or even the morning paper._

_"Wait!" Emma said quickly. "Does this mean you accept my apology?" She gave Regina her best pleading look, the one that had worked on two out of four of even the shittiest of foster moms._

_"Apology," Regina repeated Emma's words as if she couldn't quite comprehend them. "What apology, Miss Swan? Flowers and shoveling my walk, leaving without a word. Making certain there's a cup of coffee waiting for me at my office in the morning. Sweets from Granny's twice a week. Changing the porch light. All done without my knowledge or request. Tell me, Sheriff. In your professional opinion, does that sound more like an apology or harassment?"_

_"I...Regina..." Emma stammered. "I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable. I thought if I did something nice-"_

_"I might overlook your complete lack of forethought and caring for anyone other than yourself and your precious conscience and forget what you did, so that you would no longer be uncomfortable. You thought wrong, Miss Swan. I have no intention of assuaging your guilt with a few meaningless words so that you can sleep easier at night. You should fret and toss and turn about what you have done." Regina turned on her heel, but paused before she could shut the door in Emma's face. "You never even said the words."_

_It took Emma a moment to process what Regina had said, so stunned by her quiet, vulnerable admission, and another moment to realize that Regina was right. She never had actually said it, willing her actions to speak for her. "I am sorry, Regina," Emma said, stepping forward and praying Regina to turn around. If she could just get a glimpse of her eyes and know what Regina was thinking, she might have a chance to make this okay. "I am so sorry for ruining what you had with Robin. The last thing I wanted was to mess up your chance at happiness. You deserve-"_

_The door shut in Emma's face._

_***    ***    ***_

_"Sheriff Swan," Regina's secretary seemed nervous, nervous enough that Emma was certain she had seen his hands shaking. "I'm afraid the Mayor won't be able to see you today. You don't have an appointment."_

_"I just need five minutes," Emma said, resisting the urge to fidget. "That's all I'm asking for." She started to push past him, but he stepped in front of her._

_"Please, Sheriff Swan, I'm going to have to ask that you respect the Mayor's wishes or I'll be forced to call the deputy. I've been authorized to do that." His words hit Emma like a blow. Regina didn't want to see her so much that she was willing to call David and get Emma's own father to throw her out of Regina's office. She wanted it enough that she would ask Charming for something? Emma raised her hands and stumbled back before she turned and fled._

_There wasn't a destination in Emma's mind. She just needed to be away. She needed time to think, to figure how this was all going so wrong. She had thought she had a chance of getting Regina to forgive her that morning and it had all gone so wrong. Emma wasn't even sure how it had happened. One moment she'd been about to pull off the perfect gesture to show Regina what she felt and the next second it lay in ashes at her feet._

_Emma Swan, the great fuck up. No one could do it better than her. Emma resisted the urge to slam her fist into the side of the Bug. It wouldn't do anything but give her a sore hand, maybe break a few knuckles at the rate her day was going. She opened her door and pressed her forehead against the frame, letting her eyes fall shut. Turmoil raged inside her. Emma sucked in ragged breath. She shouldn't be this upset over Regina, but the woman had been getting under her skin since she had first come to town. This was no exception. Emma stayed there until the cold metal began to burn against her skin. It felt good. Emma didn’t move until she couldn't stand it anymore and then jerked back, getting into the car and slamming the door behind her._

_The drive to Granny's was short enough. The woman in question even had a mug of hot cocoa with whipped cream and a sprinkle of cinnamon sitting on the counter waiting for Emma by the time she made her way inside. "Thanks, Granny," Emma said, digging in her pocket for enough to cover it._

_"You look a bit frazzled, girl," Granny said, with typical bluntness. "Something the rest of us should be worried about?"_

_Emma wrapped her hands around the mug, letting its warmth sink into her hands. Instead of the calm a nice cup of cocoa usually brought her, Emma felt irritated. She squashed the urge to snatch her hands back and push the mug away. "Just a shitty day," she muttered._

_"Ah, well," Granny said. "Give it time and it will right itself."_

_Emma laughed. She couldn't help it. "Yeah, I'm sure it..." Emma couldn't even make herself finish that sentence. It was a ridiculous thought. From the looks of things, it was going to be a long time before Regina forgave her, if she ever did. "No." Emma said, admitting it out loud. "No, it won't, and I don't know how to fix it."_

_Granny eyed her for a long moment and then leaned forward, looking so much like Ruby in that instant. "What did you screw up?"_

_"I-" Emma bit her tongue before anything more than that could slip out and slumped into her seat. "I can't say." If she went blabbing around town, that would only make Regina more pissed off and rightly so._

_"Sounds serious," Granny noted. "And if it's not for the town to be worried about, it must be personal." Granny crossed her arms over her chest. "Can't see your parents staying angry with you for long - not that they'd notice with that boy teething. So it must be-"_

_Emma held up a hand quickly. "Please don't." She winced. "I don't want to make it worse."_

_"Smart," Granny said, with a nod. "But what are you going to do about it?"_

_Emma shrugged and wished there was something stronger in her mug than cocoa. Much stronger. "I don't know. I've already tried apologizing and it didn't work."_

_Granny began to wipe at the counter with a rag, but it was clear that it was more for something to do than to clean up any spills. It was spotless before she had begun. After several long moments of watching Granny clean, Emma began to shift in her seat. Granny's silence was deafening._

_"What?" Emma demanded, admitting defeat._

_"Did you really apologize? Or was it some half-assed effort that you young people think is good enough these days? You have to really mean an apology if you want it to be taken seriously and know what you’re apologizing for," Granny said, not holding Emma in suspense. It was clear that she had been waiting for Emma to ask._

_"I did mean it," Emma protested. "I meant every bit of it. I just," Emma squirmed. "I wasn't completely wrong, damn it, Granny. It wasn't my fault. I did the right thing."_

_Granny looked up from her cleaning and pinned Emma with a fierce gaze. "Then why are you sitting at my counter whining about it? If you weren't wrong, then get on with your day and let the rest sort itself out."_

_For that, Emma had no answer, except for the dull, nagging ache in her heart._

_***    ***    ***_

_A week passed before Emma took any further action. Not because Emma needed the time to figure out what she wanted to do. The sinking feeling in her stomach as she had left Granny's had made it clear, but Emma needed to decide how to go about it. She had to get it right this time. She would be lucky to get this chance. There wouldn't be another one granted her._

_Emma's first and only call was to the Mayor's office. She made an appointment to see Regina, specifying that she would need an hour of the Mayor's time at her convenience. Part of Emma had expected to be refused point blank. She had been careful to avoid any hint that this was about official Sheriff or town business. She wanted to do this as appropriately as possible. When she got the appointment, Emma couldn't resist jumping up in the air and the fist pump that followed, hissing out an excited "Yes!" until she realized David was still sitting at the desk across from her and was now giving her a quizzical look._

_The morning of her appointment, Emma took extra care with how she dressed. It didn't matter much to Emma how she looked, but appropriate was important to Regina. Emma wanted to show her that the things that were important to Regina were important to her, as well. She cared._

_Emma's hands were shaking when she walked into Regina's office at ten 'til one and took a seat in one of the straight backed wooden chairs in the outer office. She had made it a point to show up early. She and the secretary exchanged pleasantries and then Emma was left staring at her hands. It seemed like the longest ten minutes of her life, but Emma suppressed the urge to fidget. This would take the time it would take and she wouldn't let her nerves get the better of her. If Regina was going to give her this chance, she would take it and say what she had to say, then leave. Or whatever Regina wanted._

_"She's ready for you now," the secretary said._

_Emma shot out of her chair so quickly that it skidded backwards, thudding into the wall. Emma flushed. "Uh, sorry," she muttered, flushing as she stepped past the bemused man and into Regina's office._

_Regina looked as regal as ever, standing behind her desk, her hands splayed as she leaned on her desk, every line of her body radiating power and intimidation, in a sleek, black pantsuit. Emma could picture her standing there in a form fitting dress and high collar just as well. Both sights were equally intimidating. "Sheriff Swan." Regina straightened enough to tip her hand forward in a welcoming gesture. "Have a seat."_

_"Thanks. Uh, thank you." Emma corrected herself, trying to focus on anything but the way her palms were sweating and her heart was racing. She sat and tried not to notice the way Regina still towered over her._

_"You wished to speak with me about something?" Regina said, the cold chill in her tone inviting Emma to say it and get out. There would be no pleasantries._

_"I came to apologize," Emma blurted out._

_Regina's expression darkened. "Sheriff Swan-"_

_"No, please, hear me out," Emma said, sitting forward in her seat. "Just give me a chance. I know it's a lot to ask, but please." Regina sniffed and turned half-away from Emma. Emma supposed it was the closest thing she was going to get to a go-ahead. "I know what I did last time was shitty and… and cowardly. I should have told you with words, not just actions. I should have taken responsibility for what I did, but I didn’t, I half-assed it." Emma took a deep breath. "I'm so sorry, Regina. So, so sorry. I can't even put it into words. I don't mean..." Emma shook her head. "That's not your problem. What I wanted to say is, I get it. I shouldn't have brought Marian back." The words settled heavily between them. "I wanted to think what I was doing was the right thing because leaving her there to die would have been so damn hard, but I didn't stop for one second to think what I could have done to the timeline. People could have gotten hurt. They could have died. You did get hurt. I wish I could change what I did." Emma wanted to shut her eyes. She didn't want to have to see Regina's face for this next part, but she couldn't flinch now. If she did, she would know it. They both would and things would never be the same between them again. This time it was the hard way or not at all. "And I'm sorry for threatening to take Henry back to New York after the curse was broken." Her voice cracked over the words. It wasn't until Emma had started thinking about how to properly apologize for what she had done with Marian that it had occurred to her that she had more than that to apologize for. "It was wrong and you didn't deserve that. What you did for us - for him," Emma corrected herself. "It's the bravest thing I've ever seen and threatening to take him away again just because I was scared and hurt  wasn't worthy of that. God, I'm so sorry." There was a tear threatening to slip down her cheek and Emma bit her lip hard to keep it back. This was about Regina, not her. She wouldn't do anything to make Regina feel as if she needed comforting. Emma wasn't her problem._

_"Is that all, Sherriff?" Regina asked, her expression never changing._

_"I, no, there's just one more thing," Emma said, trying to pull it together. She had known she would need to plan what she wanted to say in advance if she had any hope of getting it out right, but standing here looking at Regina it was all slipping away from her in the face of what she had done. "When I was in the Enchanted Forest with Hook, when we were in the past, I realized a lot of things, but most importantly, that I finally had some place to miss. People to miss. You were a big part of that. A big part of what I think of as home." Emma gave a one-sided shrug. "I wanted to be that for you too. I hated having you hate me again, but I get it now. I get that it's not about me and what I want. So I'm promising you that I'll leave you alone. There won't be any more gifts or gestures or trying to get you to accept my apology. You want to be left alone. I should have respected that from the beginning, and I'm sorry about that too. I will from now on."_

_Emma hesitated for a second, then gave a jerky nod in Regina's direction and fled. She made it around the corner to the Bug, parked safely out of sight of prying eyes, before she let the deep, shuddering sobs come._

_***    ***     ***_

_Two Months Later_

_The door to the Sheriff's office blew open, clattering into the wall, and bouncing back on its hinges. Emma shot out of her chair, tensing as she realized it was Regina. She put her most professional smile on her face as Regina swept into the room, taking things in with an imperious glance around the office. Emma didn't have to ask to know how many things Regina would find lacking. It had been some time since she had seen Regina more than in passing. They had spoken on occasion - always briefly - about Henry, but Emma did her best to make herself scarce during pick-ups and drop-offs. She had told Regina she would respect her wishes and she meant it, even if it meant ducking out of a lunch date with Hook to avoid Granny's if Regina happened to already be there. Hook hadn't appreciated it but Emma hadn't really cared. Their relationship hadn't lasted much longer anyway, not because of that but for a myriad of other reasons._

_"Madame Mayor," Emma said. "What can the Sheriff's office do for you today?"_

_Regina ignored the question, continuing to survey her surroundings. "You've been sending your deputy over with any paperwork that my office requires."_

_"Yeah," Emma said. She wasn't really sure what she was supposed to say to that. "I thought it would be best."_

_"It's unprofessional," Regina snapped. "You are the Sheriff. You should fill the duties you were hired to do."_

_"Okay," Emma said, struggling not to sound like she was as lost as she felt. "I thought..." Emma clamped her mouth shut. "Sorry. I'll bring the papers over myself from now on."_

_"Okay," Regina said, finally deigning to look at Emma. It was the first time they had made eye contact since that day in Regina's office. Emma gasped; she couldn't help it. Regina was looking at her, really looking at her for the first time since she had brought Marian back. There was something in her eyes that was almost soft. It stood in direct contrast with the way her arm was held close to her body, wrapping around her waist, wary and protective. Emma couldn't blame her for that, but at the moment she couldn't breathe, couldn’t move. She didn't dare. Unless she was wrong, Regina was here offering...something and Emma would do everything in her power not to ruin it._

_Regina set a disposable mug from Granny's on the desk in front of Emma, nudging a slanting stack of papers aside enough to make room for it on the crowded surface. "Henry forgot his cocoa this morning when he got on the bus. There is no reason for it to go to waste."_

_Emma swallowed hard and reached to take it. "Thank you," she said, clutching the cup to her chest, like it was something far more precious than cocoa. Which it was. "Regina-"_

_The Mayor held up a hand and Emma bit off what she had been about to say. "My gutters are clogged."_

_The subject change almost gave Emma whiplash. "Okay." It wasn't the right answer, but what was eluded her._

_"There is no way I will allow our son up on a ladder to clean them out," Regina continued. "It would be grossly irresponsible."_

_"I'm sure Storybrooke has lots of services that would be willing to do it for you," Emma said, still lost. They never had been good at small talk._

_Regina sighed. "I'm sure there is." She turned and started to walk away, then stopped with her back still to Emma. "If you wanted to come and help me this afternoon."_

_The lightbulb came on. "I'll be there," Emma blurted out. "What time?"_

_Regina seemed startled, turning back toward Emma. "Two? I have one last meeting after lunch." She glanced around the office. "If you can't make it, Sheriff..."_

_"I'll be there," Emma repeated, swearing to herself, right then and there, that no matter what happened she would be at Regina's at that time, early even._

_Regina nodded, eyeing Emma as intently as she had the office moments before. She hesitated for so long that Emma thought she might leave without another word. She would stand here as long as Regina was willing though, drinking in Regina's presence, the lines of her face, the faint hint of her perfume, the sharpness of her gaze and the way she made Emma's heart race with just one look._

_"Henry was not the only one that I missed when we were trapped in the Enchanted Forest."_

_The words echoed in Emma's mind for a moment and then exploded like the grand finale at a Fourth of July celebration. Regina had missed her too. Emma couldn't help the grin that nearly split her face at those words. She tempered it immediately, knowing how big of an admission that was for Regina, but she couldn't help the giddiness that was welling up within her. Her heart pounded for joy in her chest. The corner of Regina's mouth lifted in the tiniest of answering smiles and Emma thought maybe, just maybe, things would be okay if she could manage not to fuck it up this time._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope everyone enjoyed it, and I'd love to hear any thoughts or criticism you might have for it. It'd be greatly appreciated.


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